1. Posted: May 18, 2016In:

    A simple-minded, kindhearted man enjoys a life of accidental success and fame when all he wants is to love the beautiful woman he has known since they were kids.

    Neer Shelter Singularity

    This is definitely a hard film to logline. His objectives change throughout the story and adjust to fit each stage in his hero's journey, the change of objectives throughout a story is not unheard of yet not common. His outer journey goal was to get the girl, while the inner journey goal was to matuRead more

    This is definitely a hard film to logline.

    His objectives change throughout the story and adjust to fit each stage in his hero’s journey, the change of objectives throughout a story is not unheard of yet not common.

    His outer journey goal was to get the girl, while the inner journey goal was to mature into an adult. The steps he took on his way to maturity were illustrated in his actions and provided a series of trials for him to pass before becoming the man he wanted to be.?The likeness to the maturity that his country undergoes throughout the story provides an additional layer of interest as a metaphor, and in my mind what made the film so successful.

    As you pointed out though, the story is different to the traditional hollywood paradigm. I believe this is the case on account of it prioritising the inner journey as the A plot and the outer journey as the B plot.

    Therefore the logline would best describe the A plot – his ambition to become an adult:

    After being bullied as a child a simple minded man must learn how to become an adult by being?an athlete, soldier, business man and spiritual leader?until finally becoming a single father.

    Not the greatest logline, but as we said this is a tough one.

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  2. Posted: May 18, 2016In:

    To escape physiological torture, a teenager who got ?rescued? from his abusive mother, rallies the other students at his new school against the torturer, the headmistress, by deliberately bending and stretching the rules.

    Neer Shelter Singularity

    The loglein uses too many vague descriptions and lacks detail therefore?the plot isn't?clear. What was the specific event that made the student need to take action? Was he beaten? Was his only friend put in hospital or killed? As it is now the logline lacks the starting point for the story, best toRead more

    The loglein uses too many vague descriptions and lacks detail therefore?the plot isn’t?clear.

    What was the specific event that made the student need to take action? Was he beaten? Was his only friend put in hospital or killed?
    As it is now the logline lacks the starting point for the story, best to describe an?inciting incident than describe a situation.

    Secondly the goal is not clear. What does rally student against the headmistress mean? Will they tell the police about her? Will they trap her in her office? What will they do?

    What does “…bending and stretching the rules?” mean in specific terms? What action will they actually take to achieve their goal?

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  3. Posted: May 18, 2016In:

    A military astronaut test flying a secret craft becomes stranded in a parallel world where the U.S. is a third world country ruled by a brutal dictator.

    Neer Shelter Singularity

    Consider the modern version of Planet of The Apes, it is similar in setting and subject matter. The logline for that movie would likely focus on the astronaut's struggle to find the long lost human ship. In other words his goal is to get home the action by which he will achieve this goal is findingRead more

    Consider the modern version of Planet of The Apes, it is similar in setting and subject matter. The logline for that movie would likely focus on the astronaut’s struggle to find the long lost human ship. In other words his goal is to get home the action by which he will achieve this goal is finding the since space ship, the obstacle are the apes and the antagonist is is the ape general.

    For example:
    After entering a space anomaly an astronaut is stranded in the future on an Ape ruled Earth, he must find a human built space ship to fly and pilot himself back in time before the anomaly disappears.

    The back story, his family and the status quo of the people on Earth is not relevant to the logline – same applies to your concept.

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