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After an escaped convict forces a divorced mother to hide him, they fall in love and must flee to Canada to start a new life.
This is a tough one to logline as the main dramatic point of view could be the woman's and could be the man's. Depending on which one you choose the inciting incident will change. If it is the woman then it's the man?forcing her to hide him, if it is the man then it's his injury - it sounds like theRead more
This is a tough one to logline as the main dramatic point of view could be the woman’s and could be the man’s. Depending on which one you choose the inciting incident will change.
See lessIf it is the woman then it’s the man?forcing her to hide him, if it is the man then it’s his injury – it sounds like the love story is a subsequent B plot.
After uncovering a conspiracy plotted by the king a Templar is forced to intervene in the king’s plot before it leads to civil war.
The latest draft is an improvement but it still lacks detail. What will the knight actually do in order to achieve his goal? His actions are going to be most of act 2 i.e most of the film and therefore they need to be specified in the logline. Will he fight other knights? Or investigate suspicious aRead more
The latest draft is an improvement but it still lacks detail.
What will the knight actually do in order to achieve his goal?
His actions are going to be most of act 2 i.e most of the film and therefore they need to be specified in the logline. Will he fight other knights? Or investigate suspicious activity in the royal court? Or seek out spies? etc? What ever he does it needs to be specified.
See lessWhen seven actors arrive ready to shoot a horror movie but the location is desert. Soon they start dying just as the script describes.
I think the intention was to specify that "...the location is a desert...". I'm not sure how the location being a desert is a problem, I've worked on many shoots that were in a desert and there were no deaths involved. Best to specify what it is that makes this particular location dangerous. The bigRead more
I think the intention was to specify that “…the location is a desert…”.
I’m not sure how the location being a desert is a problem, I’ve worked on many shoots that were in a desert and there were no deaths involved.
Best to specify what it is that makes this particular location dangerous.
The biggest problem with this logline is the glaring lack of plot:
See lessWho is the main character? What does he or she want to achieve and why?