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After a primordial fungal outbreak on an Arctic oil rig, an overambitious district manager pushes to cover up the incident until he too is exposed. As the hospital becomes overrun by spore spreading rapists, he must battle his way to a lone survivor who may be the key to a cure.
Good point DPG I'd combine Richiev's and my suggestions with a change to: After a primordial fungal outbreak on an Arctic oil rig turns his crew into barbaric fiends, a hypochondriac manager must battle his way to a lone survivor who is the key to a cure.?
Good point DPG I’d combine Richiev’s and my suggestions with a change to:
After a primordial fungal outbreak on an Arctic oil rig turns his crew into barbaric fiends, a hypochondriac manager must battle his way to a lone survivor who is the key to a cure.?
See lessAfter a primordial fungal outbreak on an Arctic oil rig, an overambitious district manager pushes to cover up the incident until he too is exposed. As the hospital becomes overrun by spore spreading rapists, he must battle his way to a lone survivor who may be the key to a cure.
Good point DPG I'd combine Richiev's and my suggestions with a change to: After a primordial fungal outbreak on an Arctic oil rig turns his crew into barbaric fiends, a hypochondriac manager must battle his way to a lone survivor who is the key to a cure.?
Good point DPG I’d combine Richiev’s and my suggestions with a change to:
After a primordial fungal outbreak on an Arctic oil rig turns his crew into barbaric fiends, a hypochondriac manager must battle his way to a lone survivor who is the key to a cure.?
See lessAfter a primordial fungal outbreak on an Arctic oil rig, an overambitious district manager pushes to cover up the incident until he too is exposed. As the hospital becomes overrun by spore spreading rapists, he must battle his way to a lone survivor who may be the key to a cure.
Hi Michael. This is a vast improvement on the previous drafts as there is a clear link between all the elements and the log lines is well structured. I would reduce the word count to ease the read and change "...pushes to cover up the incident..." to a specific action as that is too vague for a readRead more
Hi Michael.
This is a vast improvement on the previous drafts as there is a clear link between all the elements and the log lines is well structured.
I would reduce the word count to ease the read and change “…pushes to cover up the incident…” to a specific action as that is too vague for a reader to understand exactly what he is doing.
The word “…rapists…” is confusing out of place and seams unrelated to the plot. I understand that this is part of the story but for the logline purposes better to omit it and reserve any of these descriptions for a synopsis.
My try:
See lessAfter an overambitious manager gets infected by a primordial fungus that killed his Arctic oil rig crew he must avoid the media and stop the spread of fungus throughout the local hospital by saving the sole survivor that holds a cure.