1. Posted: July 10, 2019In:

    Forced to quit drinking, Lucy must learn how to navigate sobriety in a world that’s often three sheets to the wind. Turns out avoiding happy hour is a lot easier than avoiding your true self.

    Richiev Singularity

    What is the lead character's ultimate goal, to quit drinking for good, or to find her true self? Because as written, things happen to your lead character in this logline, instead of the lead character taking action.

    What is the lead character’s ultimate goal, to quit drinking for good, or to find her true self?

    Because as written, things happen to your lead character in this logline, instead of the lead character taking action.

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  2. Posted: July 10, 2019In:

    Recovering from his suicide attempt, a famous techno artist regains his passion for music as he falls in love with a transsexual woman painter with internalized transphobia, for whom he will sacrifice his popularity for her to realize her worth.

    Richiev Singularity

    I'm not quite sure of the connection between helping someone overcome their transphobia and giving up their popularity. If the lead character gives up his popularity, the painter would still be transphobic. (Obviously there a piece of the story missing that bridges this gap and would probably be impRead more

    I’m not quite sure of the connection between helping someone overcome their transphobia and giving up their popularity.

    If the lead character gives up his popularity, the painter would still be transphobic.

    (Obviously there a piece of the story missing that bridges this gap and would probably be important to the logline)

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  3. Posted: July 10, 2019In:

    When all their attempts to achieve happiness fail, even when fulfilling family expectations, a highly disciplined hetero cis woman must deconstruct and find out what she wants in all aspects of her life even if that includes rediscovering her sexuality to be happy.

    Best Answer
    Richiev Singularity

    There are lots of great things you can do with with a lead character trying to find themselves.However, you are missing the 'moment' of clarity when she realizes she needs to change.For instance, when the lead character of "American Beauty" is fired, that is when he changes and begins to speak his mRead more

    There are lots of great things you can do with with a lead character trying to find themselves.

    However, you are missing the ‘moment’ of clarity when she realizes she needs to change.

    For instance, when the lead character of “American Beauty” is fired, that is when he changes and begins to speak his mind to everyone.

    Adding this moment to your logline will give it a little more focus and as a result, help draw your reader in.

    (Granted, this moment of clarity won’t exactly be the reason, but simply the last straw but in a story like this I would definitely have that moment in the logline)

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