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this hour long dramatic comedy will follow a Native American Indian who found refuge in the city that never sleeps after being exiled from her reservation not only due to her sexuality, but for having a child out of wedlock?
Hey mii, you don't need to mention the genre and length of your script in the logline.? It should be clear by reading your logline. Also, what is the goal of your Native American refugee after he finds a new home in the city that never sleeps (I guess you mean NY by that)? The dramatic question is nRead more
Hey mii,
you don’t need to mention the genre and length of your script in the logline.? It should be clear by reading your logline.
See lessAlso, what is the goal of your Native American refugee after he finds a new home in the city that never sleeps (I guess you mean NY by that)?
The dramatic question is not clear at all with this version.
Try to form a new sentence based on the general logline formula.
When broke indie movie-maker and his friends heads into a desert to shot found footage horror movie, they stumble upon a real monster and have to fight to survive.
Is this a short-shock or a feature-length concept? They have to fight to survive? Yeah, that is basically what happens in every horror movie. What seperates your pitch from others out there? What is the theme of your story?
Is this a short-shock or a feature-length concept?
See lessThey have to fight to survive? Yeah, that is basically what happens in every horror movie. What seperates your pitch from others out there?
What is the theme of your story?
The televised poker tournament is on an hour break and the chip leader is locked in a utility closet; she hears a bomb ticking. Can she defuse it and get back in time to win?
This reads like a tagline instead of a logline. Do you know the formula of proper loglines? I also suggest you add some mystery or flaw to your character. "Chip leader" doesn't mean much. Is she a world-class player or anything?
This reads like a tagline instead of a logline.
See lessDo you know the formula of proper loglines?
I also suggest you add some mystery or flaw to your character. “Chip leader” doesn’t mean much. Is she a world-class player or anything?