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A callous human executioner of synthetic citizens becomes a target himself when he helps a humanoid and her daughter escape termination from a cybernetic slaughterhouse
I wouldn't touch a thing! Perfect the way it is.
I wouldn’t touch a thing! Perfect the way it is.
See lessRidiculed by his friends after a meltdown a bipolar drug dealer finds his inner genius and develops a product that becomes a Walmart bestseller.
Very good logline; I don't even see the need for the "ridiculed by friends after a meltdown" part, as it adds nothing of value to the logline. It's the inciting incident, but I don't think it's necessary in the prime real estate of the logline verbage. You should define the product a bit more, howevRead more
Very good logline; I don’t even see the need for the “ridiculed by friends after a meltdown” part, as it adds nothing of value to the logline. It’s the inciting incident, but I don’t think it’s necessary in the prime real estate of the logline verbage.
You should define the product a bit more, however. If he develops a frisbee, that’s not interesting. Hopefully the drug he develops is a direct irony of being bi-polar. That’s the trick…
Good luck!
See lessWhen every tree, flower and shrub on Earth uproots itself, ascends into space, and forms a gigantic forest-like sphere, an arrogant but gifted space captain and his crew must fly an introverted boy who speaks \"plant\" through its dangerous caverns to its centre, to plead for the return of all plant-life before humanity starves to death.
Great concept, but the logline is a bit busy and wordy. Try to reduce it to bare minimums, if possible (25-30 words max). Some things do not need mentioning in logline, like the boy speaking "plant". Your hook is the uprooting and the "Space Jungle" concept. Very unique.
Great concept, but the logline is a bit busy and wordy. Try to reduce it to bare minimums, if possible (25-30 words max). Some things do not need mentioning in logline, like the boy speaking “plant”. Your hook is the uprooting and the “Space Jungle” concept. Very unique.
See less