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  1. Posted: August 22, 2013In: Public

    A fledging actress, unlucky in love, must decide whether to risk it all or play it safe for the “happily ever after” she wants.

    SLClibra
    Added an answer on August 23, 2013 at 9:05 am

    What it is is this "bookish" kind of girl meets a guy during rehearsals for her high school play. She's cast, he's helping with stage crew. And he's weeks away from leaving for two years on an LDS mission, which basically means he has to put any and all dating relationships on hold , and they make aRead more

    What it is is this “bookish” kind of girl meets a guy during rehearsals for her high school play. She’s cast, he’s helping with stage crew. And he’s weeks away from leaving for two years on an LDS mission, which basically means he has to put any and all dating relationships on hold , and they make agreement they’re going to date when he gets back.
    She feels like he’s her only shot because when he meets her, he’s the first guy to notice her. While he’s gone, she does get involved with another guy, but he pulls a whopper that involves getting engaged to his ex so she can stay in the country. After that, she’s scared to trust any guy, and draws the conclusion that risks in love don’t pay, so the missionary becomes a “sure bet.” It’s not a risk with him because she already knows him.

    Thanks again everyone for your feedback. This is one of my first attempts at something like this, and this site has given me quite the crash course in do’s and dont’s. Now it’s back to the drawing board. 🙂

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  2. Posted: August 22, 2013In: Public

    A fledging actress, unlucky in love, must decide whether to risk it all or play it safe for the “happily ever after” she wants.

    SLClibra
    Added an answer on August 22, 2013 at 11:21 am

    Thanks everyone for your feedback. Hopefully the edit is closer to perfection? (I doubt it, but hey, this is a craft you really learn as you go, right?)

    Thanks everyone for your feedback. Hopefully the edit is closer to perfection?
    (I doubt it, but hey, this is a craft you really learn as you go, right?)

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  3. Posted: August 20, 2013In: Public

    A young orphaned undercover detective on suspension learns from an FBI agent that his biological father's is their current target.

    SLClibra
    Added an answer on August 22, 2013 at 9:25 am

    I agree. Bring the detective in on the action. If he's your "hero", why have him sidelined?

    I agree. Bring the detective in on the action. If he’s your “hero”, why have him sidelined?

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