1. Posted: May 8, 2020In:

    A teenage loner meets his first love during lucid dreams and will have to choose between dream and reality, to be awaken without her or to never wake up.

    thedarkhorse Samurai

    I think this is a really good concept. Well done.?It just needs to be sharpened up I reckon.?It certainly ticks a lot of boxes of a marketable concept:1. It?s unique and universal. (we?ve all been a teenager and been in love.)2. Interesting dilemma - real life or dreams.3. Odd couple.?4. Unique hookRead more

    I think this is a really good concept. Well done.?It just needs to be sharpened up I reckon.?

    It certainly ticks a lot of boxes of a marketable concept:

    1. It?s unique and universal. (we?ve all been a teenager and been in love.)

    2. Interesting dilemma – real life or dreams.

    3. Odd couple.?

    4. Unique hook – the dream girl.

    5. Interesting inciting event – hero masters (?) lucid dreaming.

    6. Fish out of water – kind of like Splash right? He enters into her dream world. She genuinely is a manic pixie dream girl.

    7. Protagonist’s arc is suggested: from loner to infatuated/lovelorn (?).

    8. It’s quite high concept/X meets Y. I’d say… AVATAR meets (maybe a teen romance? I keep thinking SPLASH because of the fish out of water angle.)

    Reminds me of this quote from Karate Kid part II:

    If I am dreaming, let me never awaken. If I am awake, let me never sleep.?

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  2. Posted: May 5, 2020In:

    When a young homeless woman is confronted by an evil older male blackmailer, who holds the key to her secret, she must choose between her dignity and a roof over her head. (this is for a scene, but I’m requested to submit a logline for it).

    thedarkhorse Samurai

    Posted this in the other one...A woman trying to get her life back on track is blackmailed into sex by a man who threatens to inform her shelter and care program about her secret drug habit.Idea - could make her counsellor the sex predator??So what's it about? A woman regaining control over her lifeRead more

    Posted this in the other one…

    A woman trying to get her life back on track is blackmailed into sex by a man who threatens to inform her shelter and care program about her secret drug habit.

    Idea – could make her counsellor the sex predator??

    So what’s it about? A woman regaining control over her life in more ways than one.

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  3. Posted: May 6, 2020In:

    A man blackmails a young woman he?ll inform the shelter and care program about her ongoing drug habit, leaving her homeless, unless she becomes his mistress.

    thedarkhorse Samurai

    INTENTION: to blackmail a woman into becoming his mistress.OBSTACLE: ?I think this might work better from the woman?s angle. Let?s try it out?INTENTION: get clean? get her life back together?OBSTACLE: her drug habit - which is ruining her life in more ways than one.A woman trying to get life back toRead more

    INTENTION: to blackmail a woman into becoming his mistress.

    OBSTACLE: ?

    I think this might work better from the woman?s angle. Let?s try it out?

    INTENTION: get clean? get her life back together?

    OBSTACLE: her drug habit – which is ruining her life in more ways than one.

    A woman trying to get life back together is blackmailed into sex by a man who threatens to inform her shelter and care program about her secret drug habit.

    I dunno?

    What do you think is the obstacle from the man?s angle? What?s standing in his way??

    Intention and obstacle both need to be strong and specific.

    ?

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