–
AO31Logliner
Massacres and mysterious disappearings are occuring in the Kabyle mountain regions of Algeria by a dangerous beast. A professional hunter is engaged by authorities to track down the creature and eliminate it, he will soon realize the task won’t be as simple as his previous achievements.
Share
“When he’s hired to track down a mysterious beast who has been terrorizing the people of the Kabyle mountains, a professional hunter soon finds the tables turned when he and his crew become the hunted.”
Richiev’s version is an improvement.
“he’s†Not the protagonist. Best in a logline to state the protagonist upfront.
Best to start…â€When (protagonist). Say what happens/occurs…then what they must do or not do and why…and what will be the result if or if the goal isn’t met.
I think your log line would sound better as follows –
When an expert hunter discovers a ferocious beast, he risks his reputation if he doesn’t pursue and capture it to save a village at the expense of endangering his team mates.
What do you think?