A fledging actress, unlucky in love, must decide whether to risk it all or play it safe for the “happily ever after” she wants.

Just thought I'd second dpg up there -- ending a logline with a question, IMO anyway, always reads a bit cheezily/ amateurish. The dramatic question should always be implied in the structure and content of the logline.

Also -- It's not clear what she's actually risking at the moment...

What about something like:

'After landing the part of a lifetime in Broadway, a hopelessly romantic fledgling actress puts her budding career on the line when her childhood prince charming returns home after years of missionary work overseas.'

A few words too long, and maybe nqr in terms of YOUR story, but hope it helps.

Best of luck with it.

In loglines, the dramatic question is implied, but never explicitly stated.

Your current logline seems to have two story threads, one explicit (the search for the Prince and the implied, a successful if fledgling acting career. Are these two story threads and associated goals in conflict? If they are, how?

If not, why not?

And is she "risk aversive" in her career or in romance? Or both? And if she's risk adverse only in terms of her career, how did she get to be successful actress? Acting is inherently a very risky business. Fledgling actors must cope with rejection and failure more frequently than they are likely to encounter in romance.

In loglines, the dramatic question is implied, but never explicitly stated.

Your current logline seems to have two story threads, one explicit (the search for the Prince and the implied, a successful if fledgling acting career. Are these two story threads and associated goals in conflict? If they are, how?

If not, why not?

And is she "risk aversive" in her career or in romance? Or both? And if she's risk adverse only in terms of her career, how did she get to be successful actress? Acting is inherently a very risky business. Fledgling actors must cope with rejection and failure more frequently than they are likely to encounter in romance.

So I think I've gotten a little bit closer, but can loglines end in a question mark? Thanks everyone for your input. I know there are a ton of articles, books, seminars, webisodes, etc.. out there about this, but the only way I really sink it into my skull is practice.

Okay, that clarifies. First time, I've read a story line where an LDS missionary guy is a "date from hell" :-)

As I understand your story, I perceive a problem with your protagonist: Hollyweird types are attracted to stories about characters who take the biggest risks for their biggest dream, who won't settle for less, who don't make safe choices.

The character can start out weak and willing to settle for less, for a safe choice. But the character arc that appeals to them is one where she develops the inner strength to risk all for love, to go for what she really wants in life.

What does she really, really want? What is her biggest dream? Who is the incarnation of her biggest dream?

Okay, that clarifies. First time, I've read a story line where an LDS missionary guy is a "date from hell" :-)

As I understand your story, I perceive a problem with your protagonist: Hollyweird types are attracted to stories about characters who take the biggest risks for their biggest dream, who won't settle for less, who don't make safe choices.

The character can start out weak and willing to settle for less, for a safe choice. But the character arc that appeals to them is one where she develops the inner strength to risk all for love, to go for what she really wants in life.

What does she really, really want? What is her biggest dream? Who is the incarnation of her biggest dream?