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When a secret society of intellectual samurai compromise a tech company’s financial software, a psychic strategist must decode an ancient work of popular Japanese fiction before the global economy collapses.
At the minute it reads like a collection of unrelated events. ?I have a few questions. intellectual samurai? Are these actual Samurai? ?If so why not just Samurai? psychic strategist? Again why not just a Psychic? ?Are there accepted classifications of psychic that you expect the reader to know so aRead more
At the minute it reads like a collection of unrelated events. ?I have a few questions.
intellectual samurai?
Are these actual Samurai? ?If so why not just Samurai?
psychic strategist?
Again why not just a Psychic? ?Are there accepted classifications of psychic that you expect the reader to know so a strategic one has meaning?
Why and how does this prevent world economic collapse?
This is an attempt that may have nothing to do with your story. ?I hope that it helps.
A psychic must decode an ancient text containing a way of stopping a secret society that has comprised financial software and plan to plunge the world into economic collapse.
Like I said, it may not be your story. ?But the events are tied together now.
See lessAfter being pressured by the cops to turn informant a teen is sent on a run by her drug dealer boss, who is holding her younger sister, knowing this run will get her killed.
Here are a few beats.* After the cops pick her up and pressure her. ?She decides to leave town and go to her friends town and start over because she knows her boss is suspicious and that is bad (potentially fatal).* She isn't ready to leave just yet, so she has to see him. ?He sends her on a job. HeRead more
Here are a few beats.
* After the cops pick her up and pressure her. ?She decides to leave town and go to her friends town and start over because she knows her boss is suspicious and that is bad (potentially fatal).
* She isn’t ready to leave just yet, so she has to see him. ?He sends her on a job. He holds her sister.
* She suspects she is being sent to be killed so it will not be linked to him.
* She has to find a way to get her sister back, make sure he can’t follow her (arrested or dead) and get to the new town, with no one knowing she went there.
Yet again (my MO) I am writing about a person struggling against a crap situation beyond their control. ?They are trying to find a better life but they are stopped at every turn. ?They realise they can fail and make life better for others, or take everyone with them.
I am writing this one to film. ?It is set in a number of telephone boxes, car interior and street. ?But the Logline is still important if and when I go looking for funding.
Thanks everyone.
See lessAfter uncovering a conspiracy plotted by the king a Templar is forced to intervene in the king’s plot before it leads to civil war.
'Maintain peace' and 'save from war' seem the same. A Templar knight struggles save J from war by (specific action) thwarting a conspiracy ?by the corrupt king. Gives you a little more room for story.
‘Maintain peace’ and ‘save from war’ seem the same.
A Templar knight struggles save J from war by (specific action) thwarting a conspiracy ?by the corrupt king.
Gives you a little more room for story.
See less