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A vengeance-driven PI hires an intellectual cat-burglar to help her investigate a murder that links a multinational tech giant to a notorious cybercriminal.
"A vengeance driven..." Seems a little clumsy, try to make it more direct and action based, "seeking vengeance ...", "intellectual cat burglar" is descriptive but doesn't relate to the story "intellectual" doesn't tell us what motivates him in the story.
“A vengeance driven…” Seems a little clumsy, try to make it more direct and action based, “seeking vengeance …”, “intellectual cat burglar” is descriptive but doesn’t relate to the story “intellectual” doesn’t tell us what motivates him in the story.
See lessAn old-school private investigator, assisted by his tech-savvy daughter, investigates the alleged death of the son of a presidential candidate only to uncover a deep conspiracy that puts them in the crosshairs.
This is just a suggestion, An old school private investigator and his tech savvy daughter investigate the murder of the son of a presidential candidate only to become the killers next targets.
This is just a suggestion,
An old school private investigator and his tech savvy daughter investigate the murder of the son of a presidential candidate only to become the killers next targets.
See lessAn old-school private investigator, assisted by his tech-savvy daughter, investigates the alleged death of the son of a presidential candidate only to uncover a deep conspiracy that puts them in the crosshairs.
Dead or Not Dead? Alleged to be Dead is confusing. You can drop "takes on a case" and just say "investigates". I'd stay with presidential candidate and drop senator. By shortening it you give it a action feel. Plus it gives you room to state the threat.
Dead or Not Dead? Alleged to be Dead is confusing. You can drop “takes on a case” and just say “investigates”. I’d stay with presidential candidate and drop senator.
By shortening it you give it a action feel. Plus it gives you room to state the threat.
See less