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After 6 weeks of grieving, a 28 year old widow's family has decided she is coming home for christmas to 'get better', whether she likes it or not.
Having the widow coming home for Xmas is the family's goal. But she is the protagonist. So, what is her objective goal? Who opposes that goal? What is at stake? That is, what does she expect to gain if she achieves her objective? What does she stand to lose if she fails?
Having the widow coming home for Xmas is the family’s goal. But she is the protagonist. So, what is her objective goal?
Who opposes that goal? What is at stake? That is, what does she expect to gain if she achieves her objective? What does she stand to lose if she fails?
See lessA syndicated advice columnist fears for her life when a psychotic fan doesn't like the results of her counsel and fixates on the columnist as the source of all her problems.
A syndicated advice columnist must fight for her life when a psychotic reader blames her advice for the loss of his job and the failure of his marriage and swears revenge. Or some such. The point of my suggestion is (per Richiev) to recast "fears for her life" from passive to active "must fight forRead more
Or some such. The point of my suggestion is (per Richiev) to recast “fears for her life” from passive to active “must fight for her life”. And to make what is general, “the results of her counsel”, specific: “loss of job…failure of his marriage”. Also note I changed the psycho to a male — it might offer more dramatic contrast between the characters.
I suggest that something akin to the 1st two changes (passive—>active; general—>specific) are critical to punching up the logline. The third (female —>male) may or may not be as critical.
fwiw.
See lessHigh school senior Koa Cohen's battle with ritualistic OCD is replaced by a condition in which he cannot distinguish between his unsettling day dreams and reality.
>>>to be able to distinguish what is reality and what is not That's a valid goal, but it seems to me to be more of a subjective goal. In contrast, the obsession with rituals to save his mother is clearly an objective goal. That is, the conflict is mostly external, hence, easy to dramatically visuallRead more
>>>to be able to distinguish what is reality and what is not
That’s a valid goal, but it seems to me to be more of a subjective goal. In contrast, the obsession with rituals to save his mother is clearly an objective goal. That is, the conflict is mostly external, hence, easy to dramatically visually, easy for the audience to determine whether he succeeds or fails. (He fails: she dies)
The conventional purpose of a logline is describe the objective goal. Subjective goals are ancillary to objective goals; they are intangible psychological conflicts that have to resolved in order to achieve the objective goal. A simplistic example: a character must overcome his fear of heights (subjective goal) in order to climb a steep mountain (objective goal).
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