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In The City – A dirty cop with a gambling debt he must pay off with 24 hours forces a fast-talking criminal to take him to a lockbox full of cash he claims is stashed somewhere in the city.
This is promising, but as far as I'm concerned I'm not sure about the main character (the dirty cop or the criminal? both seem hardly likables). In my opinion you can avoid this: "he claims is stashed somewhere in the city"because it's vague and doesn't add any interest to the logline. Then, it is nRead more
This is promising, but as far as I’m concerned I’m not sure about the main character (the dirty cop or the criminal? both seem hardly likables). In my opinion you can avoid this: “he claims is stashed somewhere in the city”because it’s vague and doesn’t add any interest to the logline. Then, it is not clear where the problem arises: a cop forces the criminal, the criminal takes him to the money, end of the story.
See lessZen O’Clock (Pilot) – An office lackey buys an alarm clock possessed with the soul of a world renowned self-help guru and takes advice from it on how to improve his daily life.
Hello, in this logline it seems like the main character has zero problems: he finds advice, cool for him, but no conflict=no story. A story is never built on a solution, always about a false solution (or a problem).
Hello, in this logline it seems like the main character has zero problems: he finds advice, cool for him, but no conflict=no story. A story is never built on a solution, always about a false solution (or a problem).
See lessHome Invasion – A brilliant engineer and his family get trapped in their home when his highly sophisticated, prototype security device goes rogue.
Hello, this seems to me like the situation rather than a picture of the whole plot. When a brillian engineer and his family are trapped at home by a?sophisticated security device, then what happens ?
Hello, this seems to me like the situation rather than a picture of the whole plot.
See lessWhen a brillian engineer and his family are trapped at home by a?sophisticated security device, then what happens ?