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After a werewolf slaughters the family of a pregnant newlywed, she learns a Grimm ancestral secret and becomes a cold-hearted huntress while investigating who stalks her.
Hello, what is a Grimm secret? I would cut this sentence since "learning a Grimm ancestral secret" means nothing for the reader (it means nothing for me).
Hello,
what is a Grimm secret? I would cut this sentence since “learning a Grimm ancestral secret” means nothing for the reader (it means nothing for me).
See lessTrish Humphries a self-absorbed news reporter who just moved to New York finally gets her own talk show. She thinks it’s in a big network, but it’s really just public access. Now she has to learn how to work with her new team and balance her open relationship with her three boyfriends while pursuing her dream to be famous.
Hello, You can avoid the name of the cahracter (it doesn't mean nothing and in a logline every word is precious). I would try to reduce the word count and focus on the inciting event, the?main character's goal and the opponents. I give it a try, "When a self-absorbed news reporter joins a public netRead more
Hello,
You can avoid the name of the cahracter (it doesn’t mean nothing and in a logline every word is precious).
I would try to reduce the word count and focus on the inciting event, the?main character’s goal and the opponents.
I give it a try,
“When a self-absorbed news reporter joins a public network, she must deal with her new team?and her three boyfriends to become a successful journalist”.
I don’t understand why you say “it’s just public access”… I think the concept works better in 2 ways:
See lessIf she’s a newbie in a big network, or if she’s a veteran/expert in a small network.
When her brother?s diary mysteriously appears at her doorstep, an art forgery investigator uses it to decipher location of stolen diamonds. She also discovers the truth about her father who masterminded an international heist and embarks on a hunt for the treasure during which she finds her family lost decades ago.
Hello, I'm sure that any book can be transformed in a movie. I think that what you need the most is to make tough decision and focus only on the very main elements. You want to tell too many things that are important to you, but are they important to us, readers? The limit to 25 words actually HELPSRead more
Hello,
I’m sure that any book can be transformed in a movie.
I think that what you need the most is to make tough decision and focus only on the very main elements. You want to tell too many things that are important to you, but are they important to us, readers?
The limit to 25 words actually HELPS you. To?make tough decision about what to say.
“When she finds her brother’s diary, an art forgery investigator?follows the leads to locate?the?diamonds stolen by her father in an?international heist”. (25 words)
Usually in the logline you track the external goal (find the treasure) so we can forget the inner goal (truth about the family).
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