1. Posted: May 2, 2017In:

    A 45 year old homemaker finds herself on the verge of an ugly divorce. With her estranged relationships and a broken heart, she tumbles further down when is left bereft of an alimony. To leave behind rock bottom, she must discover herself and start a new life.

    Foxtrot25 Uberwriter

    You have listed plot points only. A logline would look something like this... A middle-aged woman deals with divorce and a broken heart before seeking a new life of happiness. And there is so much more you could include.

    You have listed plot points only. A logline would look something like this…

    A middle-aged woman deals with divorce and a broken heart before seeking a new life of happiness.

    And there is so much more you could include.

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  2. Posted: April 30, 2017In:

    After witnessing the murder of her student, a teacher is forced to work with an off-grid agency to stop an underground terror division.

    Foxtrot25 Uberwriter

    This sounds good, with the hook being the agency. What I like, Can be a contained thriller. Cheap to make. The teacher is a vulnerable player in this and female. She is drawn into the story via the inciting incident of the student. What I don't like, As Mandy mentioned, the terror plot is vague andRead more

    This sounds good, with the hook being the agency.

    What I like,

    Can be a contained thriller. Cheap to make. The teacher is a vulnerable player in this and female. She is drawn into the story via the inciting incident of the student.

    What I don’t like,

    As Mandy mentioned, the terror plot is vague and comes off as just another generic terror organization. The teacher/student has been done before (no biggie, just make sure it has unique elements.) There is no mention of an antagonist role/drive. Why does this agency need a teacher to help them?

    Don’t assume these days that saying “terror” alone is good enough. Have a new wrinkle with it.

    After witnessing the murder of her student, a teacher must work with a clandestine agency to stop an underground terror division from…

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  3. Posted: April 29, 2017In:

    When her main bread winner is fired, a maverick celebrity agent must battle her industry rivals and reinvent herself to save her business from impending financial ruin.

    Foxtrot25 Uberwriter

    I recommend losing the term "bread winner". I don't like it much. What is the actual thing that the agent must do to save the client that would take most of the movie to accomplish? After losing a critical celebrity client, a talent agent must reinvent her entire firm or risk losing it to financialRead more

    I recommend losing the term “bread winner”. I don’t like it much.

    What is the actual thing that the agent must do to save the client that would take most of the movie to accomplish?

    After losing a critical celebrity client, a talent agent must reinvent her entire firm or risk losing it to financial ruin or worse; her competition.

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