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A grieving couple?s predictable world gets upended when a mysterious child, who looks just like the nine-year old son they lost 7 years before, shows up on their doorstep. Looking to spice up this logline, appreciate any and all feedback.
Hi fejumas if I'm getting this right it turns out to be a vampire drama? Is it worth maybe mentioning something along those lines in the log line? I also wouldn't use 'predictable' as no one really is predictable so I don't think it really adds to it. Story idea is good although did remind me of a fRead more
Hi fejumas if I’m getting this right it turns out to be a vampire drama? Is it worth maybe mentioning something along those lines in the log line? I also wouldn’t use ‘predictable’ as no one really is predictable so I don’t think it really adds to it.
Story idea is good although did remind me of a few films but it’s not about original stories its about an original take so maybe add into the log line the thing you are doing that makes it stand out from other films that are slightly like this.
Hope this helps mate.
See lessWhen an undertaker?s lover dies, he decides to end his own existence, but makes the surprising discovery that he is apparently immortal.
The log line doesn't really tell us much about the film. He finds out he is immortal but then is he still trying to kill himself? Or does he use this as a way to do something else with his life? The irony is there but it doesn't really tell us that it is going anywhere.
The log line doesn’t really tell us much about the film. He finds out he is immortal but then is he still trying to kill himself? Or does he use this as a way to do something else with his life? The irony is there but it doesn’t really tell us that it is going anywhere.
See lessWhen a lumber baron?s greed-driven experiments in tree growth acceleration unintentionally create colossal moose, he summons John Bear, biologist, to destroy the creatures before their house-crushing size and insatiable hunger cause massive devastation.
There is too many big words for me to really be drawn in. It's like I spend more time re-reading the line then taking in what is being said as the words becomes a little jumbled and it becomes hard to read. Is it a comedy? Satirical? It doesn't overly come across in the log line. Think some of the bRead more
There is too many big words for me to really be drawn in. It’s like I spend more time re-reading the line then taking in what is being said as the words becomes a little jumbled and it becomes hard to read.
Is it a comedy? Satirical? It doesn’t overly come across in the log line. Think some of the big words need to be cut back and this may come across. It does highlight the protagonist’s conflict and obstacles so in that sense it works.
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