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A duty-bound family woman, unbearably taunted by her cruel husband and co-conspiring offspring, finds release in the joy of serial killing, until seduced by an unsuspecting victim.
"duty-bound family woman"=protagonist "taunted by her cruel husband"=inciting incident "joy of serial killing"=goal "seduced by an unsuspecting victim"= 2nd inciting incident Great to see exploration of feminine character - particularly casting a female as serial killer breaks with many stereotypes.Read more
“duty-bound family woman”=protagonist
“taunted by her cruel husband”=inciting incident
“joy of serial killing”=goal
“seduced by an unsuspecting victim”= 2nd inciting incident
Great to see exploration of feminine character – particularly casting a female as serial killer breaks with many stereotypes.
Protagonist’s character flaw is being duty-bound to a cruel husband. If this were my logline, I’d reflect on how appealing this might be for audiences. If these events were cast back in history, to more gender role conservative times, then maybe a woman might tolerate a bad husband. But even Henrik Ibsen’s 1879 play “A Doll’s House” shows female liberation happened a longtime ago. What would motivate a woman to stick around a bad husband, let alone transform her into a serial killer?
Take the story of “The Postman Always Rings Twice (1981)”. Here money and love motivate murder – of only one victim. Consider reducing this logline down to one inciting incident, and expanding upon more likeable characterization of the protagonist.
The Dexter TV series does it well, breaking with convention, by making a serial killer likeable, yet motivated. Breaking out the Silence of the Lamb mold.
See lessWhen a young 2.0 human called Uluru meets other humans like him, he must decide if he stays with the pygmy tribe that accepted him as one of their own or leave the tribe searching for a promised land occupied by other 2.0 humans.
"Young 2.0 human" = protagonist "meets other humans like him" = inciting incident "must ... search for a promised land occupied by other 2.0 humans" = character goal Great log line. Sci-fi is a favorite genre. If this were my logline, I'd go deeper on the 'Sophie's Choice (1982)' like dilemma presenRead more
“Young 2.0 human” = protagonist
“meets other humans like him” = inciting incident
“must … search for a promised land occupied by other 2.0 humans” = character goal
Great log line. Sci-fi is a favorite genre. If this were my logline, I’d go deeper on the ‘Sophie’s Choice (1982)’ like dilemma presented by the main cyborg character.
An inciting incident is usually an event that catapults the character into the story crucible. They are literally trapped, in a place that makes them feel very (very) uncomfortable.
What ‘type’ of character is the cyborg? Courageous/weak? Curious/incurious? Optimistic/Pessimistic?
By defining the personality type, the audience can then anticipate how much the character is going to squirm in the given situation. A choice to stay with friendly people, or find a promise land, will very much reflect the values of a character. A Weak, incurious and pessimistic character, would I imagine, stay in safety with the group. But what if this same character where rejected by the group – wow, what an adventure they might have. They may even transform, character arcing into a new amazing person …
See lessA terminal twenty-something comedienne who sacrificed her social life for unfulfilled stardom struggles to dupe the quixotic gigolo she falls for into becoming her hospice nurse so she won’t have to die alone.
"terminal twenty-something female comedienne" = protagonist "unfulfilled stardom" = inciting incident? "dupe the quixotic gigolo she falls for into becoming her hospice nurse" = main character goal Love the use of high concept in this logline - Doubtfire MEETS Fault in our Stars really activates theRead more
“terminal twenty-something female comedienne” = protagonist
“unfulfilled stardom” = inciting incident?
“dupe the quixotic gigolo she falls for into becoming her hospice nurse” = main character goal
Love the use of high concept in this logline – Doubtfire MEETS Fault in our Stars really activates the imagination. However, unfortunately struggling to match the characters up – obviously our 20 year old comedienne isn’t played by Mrs. Doubtfire!
If this were my logline, I’d go deeper on the inciting incident. “Unfulfilled stardom” is more of a character quality, than an actual event. Think “BOOM” -> something happens to this character – expected or unexpected – but their life is about to change, and change in a major way. The clue might be in what our impractical gigolo does to said comedienne. In other words, what is the major event that causes her to become a nurse?
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