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When her occult bookshop is burned down, an angry, self-loathing Witch must stop a secret organisation from murdering powerful witches.
If you were to detail the description of the antagonist it would help understand the story. It's not 'giving away' the ending, it's a necessity for the reader to understand your story.
If you were to detail the description of the antagonist it would help understand the story. It’s not ‘giving away’ the ending, it’s a necessity for the reader to understand your story.
See lessA drop-dead gorgeous mute is bartered into a harem where beauty is a death sentence and she must find her voice to survive.
It sounds as if the antagonist would be one of the other women in the harem, therefore, the antagonist needs to be described and the dangers clarified. Will the antagonist try to kill her? Administer genital mutilation on her? Threaten the her family? "...find her voice..." reads as a weak action foRead more
It sounds as if the antagonist would be one of the other women in the harem, therefore, the antagonist needs to be described and the dangers clarified. Will the antagonist try to kill her? Administer genital mutilation on her? Threaten the her family?
“…find her voice…” reads as a weak action for a logline, is there anything else she has to do in order to survive? Does she need to climb the ranks of the harem in order to survive? Kill or be killed?
See lessWhen her occult bookshop is burned down, an angry, self-loathing Witch must stop a secret organisation from murdering powerful witches.
This sounds really good, there's a lot of potential for obstacles, conflict and nice big set pieces. Is this set in a Harry Potter type world where there are witches and wizards living in none magic people's society? Or is this world inhabited entirely by magical people and creatures?
This sounds really good, there’s a lot of potential for obstacles, conflict and nice big set pieces.
Is this set in a Harry Potter type world where there are witches and wizards living in none magic people’s society? Or is this world inhabited entirely by magical people and creatures?
See less