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When an armed soldier takes a junior class hostage, two rookie teachers are forced to defend their class.
As a short, this could work. However, I struggle to see how this premise can be stretched out to a full length feature.
As a short, this could work. However, I struggle to see how this premise can be stretched out to a full length feature.
See lessAn outcast sea snail goes against his predatorial upbringing to find a new life with his biological rivals; the soldier crabs.
You didn't add the major story elements we recommended. Study the comments above, and perhaps other posts on this site, to get a better understanding of what we're talking about.In short, a logline needs to describe a plot. A plot is a sequence of events that starts at the inciting incident and endsRead more
You didn’t add the major story elements we recommended. Study the comments above, and perhaps other posts on this site, to get a better understanding of what we’re talking about.
In short, a logline needs to describe a plot. A plot is a sequence of events that starts at the inciting incident and ends with a goal. “…an altercation with his father…” could be an inciting incident, but in this case it isn’t directly related to his goal (which is also too vague to count as a goal by the way), that makes it not part of the same sequence of events – in other words, this isn’t a very good inciting incident.
What does “…find a new life…” mean in rpractical terms? A new house? New friends? Be more specific.
Consider Nemo, after a little argument with his father he’s whisked away, by accident, far from his home. The inciting incident was not the argument with his father but getting lost was. As a result of getting lost, his father had to go on a quest — all together now — Finding Nemo.
See lessAfter their identities are stolen, a young couple need to find their enemies, fast.
Why must they discover who stole their identities? The answer is; identity fraud, best you describe that as the inciting incident, not the house swap. After their identities were stolen, a couple must... Inciting incident aside, you don't describe their goal, which makes the plot vague. If their ideRead more
Why must they discover who stole their identities? The answer is; identity fraud, best you describe that as the inciting incident, not the house swap.
After their identities were stolen, a couple must…
Inciting incident aside, you don’t describe their goal, which makes the plot vague. If their identities were stolen their goal is to stop the thieves not just find out who they are, this may seem implicit, but in loglines you have to describe the goal and how they plan on achieving it.
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