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Lena is a Demitto, the lowest, most oppressed race in Arcadia, considered only good enough to be a servant. Damien is an Elite, the highest and most powerful of races. Not only is he an Elite ? he is the Price of Arcadia and heir to the throne. When their paths cross an unlikely relationship begins that changes both of their lives, and challenges the way of life in Arcadia for all Demittos and Elites.
Agreed with DPG, all god points.Also it is clear that the theme is class segregation, this can make for a strong story as it is one of the oldest themes used in story telling. What is it about this story though that will set it apart from the rest and make it interesting?For example in the story ofRead more
Agreed with DPG, all god points.
Also it is clear that the theme is class segregation, this can make for a strong story as it is one of the oldest themes used in story telling. What is it about this story though that will set it apart from the rest and make it interesting?
For example in the story of Exodus, from the old testament which is about class segregation, the writers mixed; status (the hero born into royalty discovers he is of the slave class), theology (which god was more powerful), human rights (slavery versus freedom), action (epic battles), magic and wonder (the 10 plagues) and a clear message all humans are born equal.
See lessA screenwriter has just finished his winning screenplay for the pitching time. Suddenly, his computer breaks down and he loses every piece of his work.
This logline doesn't describe a plot as it doesn't have a goal for the main character, rather it hints at a goal - retrieve the writer's work. In a logline best to definitively describe the plot at hand, this means an inciting incident, main character and goal. Here is a little helpful guide: https:Read more
This logline doesn’t describe a plot as it doesn’t have a goal for the main character, rather it hints at a goal – retrieve the writer’s work.
In a logline best to definitively describe the plot at hand, this means an inciting incident, main character and goal.
Here is a little helpful guide:
https://loglines.org/howto/
On a side note please refrain from posting more loglines for feedback than loglines you have reviewed your self.
See lessIt looks like you are a new user so all good for now, am sure other members will be happy to review, but please bare this in mind for future posts.
After the humongous planet destroying meteor vanishes from the sky right before impacting Earth, a troubled priest must help his congregation recover while dealing with the fact, at the moment the destruction of the earth was eminent he denied God.
Agreed with DPG, better to focus the logline on the priest's dramatic point of view. After denying the existence of god, when a life-destroying meteor threatens Earth, a priest must rediscover his faith after the threat vanishes and forces him to guide an influx of atheists into his congregation. IRead more
Agreed with DPG, better to focus the logline on the priest’s dramatic point of view.
After denying the existence of god, when a life-destroying meteor threatens Earth, a priest must rediscover his faith after the threat vanishes and forces him to guide an influx of atheists into his congregation.
I tried to illustrate the priest’s need’s causal connections to the events around him, as essentially the inciting incident is internal and while significant for a priest it still needs to be dramatized in it’s descriptions.
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