Sign Up Sign Up

Captcha Click on image to update the captcha.

Have an account? Sign In Now

Sign In Sign In

Forgot Password?

If you'd like access, Sign Up Here

Forgot Password Forgot Password

Lost your password? Please enter your email address. You will receive a link and will create a new password via email.

Captcha Click on image to update the captcha.

Have an account? Sign In Now

Sorry, you do not have permission to ask a question, You must login to ask a question.

Forgot Password?

To see everything, Sign Up Here

Sorry, you do not have permission to ask a question, You must login to ask a question.

Forgot Password?

To see everything, Sign Up Here

Please briefly explain why you feel this question should be reported.

Please briefly explain why you feel this answer should be reported.

Please briefly explain why you feel this user should be reported.

Logline It! Logo Logline It! Logo
Sign InSign Up

Logline It!

Logline It! Navigation

  • Sign Up
  • Logline Generator
  • Learn our simple Logline Formula
  • Search Loglines
Search
Post Your Logline

Mobile menu

Close
Post Your Logline
  • Signup
  • Sign Up
  • Logline Generator
  • Learn our simple Logline Formula
  • Search Loglines
  • About
  • Questions
  • Answers
  • Best Answers
  1. Posted: November 19, 2015In: Thriller

    A hard-boiled bank auditor struggles to outwit a colleague and onetime master thief bent on sinking the bank for perceived negligence that wrongfully landed him in jail.

    Best Answer
    Neer Shelter Singularity
    Added an answer on November 20, 2015 at 9:38 am

    The second draft of the logline still fails to describe a plot. What does the MC actually want to achieve? In specific terms, what are the details that will make up his success in out-witting the bad guy? The problem is you are describing the main action the main character takes as a struggle, but aRead more

    The second draft of the logline still fails to describe a plot.

    What does the MC actually want to achieve? In specific terms, what are the details that will make up his success in out-witting the bad guy?

    The problem is you are describing the main action the main character takes as a struggle, but as this is entirely generic it befits the description of most main characters in most stories. What could make this story interesting, is the specific detail of this specific action that this specific MC will take.

    See less
    • 0
    • Share
      Share
      • Share on Facebook
      • Share on Twitter
      • Share on LinkedIn
      • Share on WhatsApp
  2. Posted: November 18, 2015In: Horror

    A disgraced PR Fixer reluctantly unites with the ghost of his perverted first guest to save his families Hotel from being demolished.

    Neer Shelter Singularity
    Added an answer on November 20, 2015 at 9:30 am

    This logline is cryptic and the plot unclear. I can guess what "...PR fixer..."? means, but don't know for sure what the job entails or if it exists. As this is not a well known enough a profession, it does not serve its purpose as part of your main character's description. Further more about the MCRead more

    This logline is cryptic and the plot unclear.

    I can guess what “…PR fixer…”? means, but don’t know for sure what the job entails or if it exists. As this is not a well known enough a profession, it does not serve its purpose as part of your main character’s description. Further more about the MC’s description, all main characters should be reluctant at first or else the task ahead of them won’t appear as a challenge, and therefore achieving their goal becomes a lame affair.? Point is describing the MC as reluctant is redundant in a logline, as it should be an inherit part of the hero’s journey.

    Is the ghost a euphemism or an actual ghost? This is unclear and can have major implications on genre.

    The mention of a “…first guest…” half way through the logline is very confusing, and I had to read it several times to make sure I didn’t miss anything leading up to that description. The goal of saving his family’s hotel at the end, seams unrelated to the supposed inciting incident of a perverted ghost’s appearance, best to describe the MC as a hotel owner at the head of the logline as to at least have the story elements form a logical connection.

    See less
    • 0
    • Share
      Share
      • Share on Facebook
      • Share on Twitter
      • Share on LinkedIn
      • Share on WhatsApp
  3. Posted: November 18, 2015In: SciFi

    A pristine teen that gets taken away from her parents by a rogue organization which use children as test subjects, tries to escape before she gets sent off to a notorious section of the organizations testing facilities.

    Neer Shelter Singularity
    Added an answer on November 18, 2015 at 9:53 am

    There is a noticeable lack of detail in the logline.The main character's description is vague, as "...pristine..." is a strange choice for an MC description and it lacks specific descriptive detail. Same goes for the organization's description "...use children as test subjects..." what tests? What aRead more

    There is a noticeable lack of detail in the logline.

    The main character’s description is vague, as “…pristine…” is a strange choice for an MC description and it lacks specific descriptive detail. Same goes for the organization’s description “…use children as test subjects…” what tests? What are they trying to achieve with these tests? Are they creating super soldiers? Super spies? Are these biological weapon tests? etc…

    Why would the MC not just escape as appose to try, better to describe the main action the MC takes in definitive terms such as: she must escape before…

    Lastly, the stakes are un clear because the danger is unclear. What does “…a notorious section of the organization…” actually mean? Do they kill the test subjects there? Do they change their DNA? Whatever it is that actually gets done to test subjects, needs to be specified.

    It’s the uniqueness of the detail, and the originality of it’s combination, that can make this an interesting concept.

    See less
    • 0
    • Share
      Share
      • Share on Facebook
      • Share on Twitter
      • Share on LinkedIn
      • Share on WhatsApp
1 … 579 580 581 582 583 … 927

Sidebar

Stats

  • Loglines 8,013
  • Reviews 32,204
  • Best Reviews 629
  • Users 3,783

Adv 120x600

aalan

Explore

  • Signup

Footer

© 2022 Karel Segers. All Rights Reserved
With Love from Immersion Screenwriting.