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An old-school private investigator, assisted by his tech-savvy daughter, investigates the alleged death of the son of a presidential candidate only to uncover a deep conspiracy that puts them in the crosshairs.
Possibly true about the odd couple if that is the case. I still can't see how this case will be any more interesting than the many other PI's case. I think it needs personal stakes and clear motivation from a good inciting incident.
Possibly true about the odd couple if that is the case.
I still can’t see how this case will be any more interesting than the many other PI’s case. I think it needs personal stakes and clear motivation from a good inciting incident.
See lessA loner ice road trucker finds herself the unlikely protector of a young gangland execution witness, and must race them across the wild Alaskan ice roads to the border while being hunted by the merciless criminals.
Logically if the gang they are fleeing are criminals they wouldn't care in which country the target is they would just kill them anyway. Defining the MC's as someone who finds her self dilutes her morals and dilemma. She should need to make the hardest decision of her life and choose to protect someRead more
Logically if the gang they are fleeing are criminals they wouldn’t care in which country the target is they would just kill them anyway.
Defining the MC’s as someone who finds her self dilutes her morals and dilemma. She should need to make the hardest decision of her life and choose to protect someone else despite clear and immanent danger for the audience to be riveted by her actions, admire her aptitude and root for her success.
Best to describe a good inciting incident that puts her in the position of decision whether or not to risk her own life for someone else.
Lastly the logline lacks a clear a and definitive end to the plot or in other words a goal. What specifically is the MC fighting for are they trying to get to a safe heaven? If so where and what will it look? Is it a police station or an FBI HQ define specifically what the MC is trying soo hard to achieve.
Hope this helps.
See lessA penniless single father takes a night job monitoring the cities CCTV, but fears he is losing his sanity when strange apparitions begin appearing on the monitors before him.
Agreed with the above comments. Also perhaps use his family as a motivation to take the job and stick with it after hi sanity is challenged. The logline currently lacks an inciting incident perhaps after his daughter requires an expensive operation to survive a penniless writer must... [do somethingRead more
Agreed with the above comments.
Also perhaps use his family as a motivation to take the job and stick with it after hi sanity is challenged. The logline currently lacks an inciting incident perhaps after his daughter requires an expensive operation to survive a penniless writer must… [do something interesting]
I though giving him a job description would be more effective than just man.
Hope this helps.
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