1. Posted: November 14, 2012In:

    When an abortionist starts using flesh from unwanted pregnancies to build a body for a god, a man must stop his girlfriend's abortion in order to destroy an ancient evil.

    patrockd

    Better! But now its too long! Can you keep it under 26 words? And how does fighting evil bovine guardians stop an abortion?

    Better! But now its too long! Can you keep it under 26 words? And how does fighting evil bovine guardians stop an abortion?

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  2. Posted: November 14, 2012In:

    When an abortionist starts using flesh from unwanted pregnancies to build a body for a god, a man must stop his girlfriend's abortion in order to destroy an ancient evil.

    patrockd

    Building a body using discarded fetuses is disgusting but intriguing. I have an issue with the goal though: all he has to do is stop his girlfriend from having an abortion? That doesn't seem so hard.

    Building a body using discarded fetuses is disgusting but intriguing. I have an issue with the goal though: all he has to do is stop his girlfriend from having an abortion? That doesn’t seem so hard.

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  3. Posted: November 14, 2012In:

    When the government release swarms of drug eating insects to kill the junkie population a self-righteous policeman risks everything as he struggles to save his drug using sister from the tyrannical forces of prohibition.

    patrockd

    An interesting concept and logline - with protag, goal, obstacles and stakes! It can be trimmed down though. Howabout: When the government releases a swarm of junkie killing insects, a self righteous policeman must save his addict sister.

    An interesting concept and logline – with protag, goal, obstacles and stakes! It can be trimmed down though. Howabout:

    When the government releases a swarm of junkie killing insects, a self righteous policeman must save his addict sister.

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