Have an account? Sign In Now
Lost your password? Please enter your email address. You will receive a link and will create a new password via email.
Please briefly explain why you feel this question should be reported.
Please briefly explain why you feel this answer should be reported.
Please briefly explain why you feel this user should be reported.
An accomplished Nigerian scam artist, beset by his conscience after his latest victim commits suicide, decides to quit the game but there is one last score.
I know this is completely different, but your logline got me thinking.-------------------------------"After his latest victim commits suicide, a Nigerian scam artist goes straight and starts his own legitimate business, only to find the government officials and unions he must deal with are more corrRead more
I know this is completely different, but your logline got me thinking.
——————————-
“After his latest victim commits suicide, a Nigerian scam artist goes straight and starts his own legitimate business, only to find the government officials and unions he must deal with are more corrupt than he ever was.”
——————————
The ‘one last job’?movie has been done a lot, (Which is okay, but needs a strong hook for it to work) but what about a con-man who goes straight, only to find the seedy hoops you have to jump through to start a ‘legitimate’ business’ is more of a scam than his old life.
See lessAfter Mankind’s potential for good, The Son of the Devil, in defiance of his father, arrives in Los Angeles to send the supernatural creatures back to hell before they take over the city and find the hole in the Gateway before they take over the world.
The problem with the new version is the word 'After' because if you start a logline with the word after it implies an?inciting incident, not?a motivation.For instance, if you start the logline with: "After a train wreck..." You are saying there was a trainwreck and the story takes place after this mRead more
The problem with the new version is the word ‘After’ because if you start a logline with the word after it implies an?inciting incident, not?a motivation.
For instance, if you start the logline with: “After a train wreck…” You are saying there was a trainwreck and the story takes place after this major event.
But your logline reads funny because you say. “After mankind’s potential for good…” This is confusing and causes the reader to have to decipher the logline.
You should rearrange the order a little bit:
See less“After Los Angeles is invaded by demons, the devil’s estranged son, who believes in mankind’s?potential for good, must…” (Then tell us what he must do)
After Mankind’s potential for good, The Son of the Devil, in defiance of his father, arrives in Los Angeles to send the supernatural creatures back to hell before they take over the city and find the hole in the Gateway before they take over the world.
What are the stakes? Why would the son of the devil care? This sounds like chaos, a good time. How do supernatural creatures attacking LA in any way affect the son of the Devil? Why does he want to stop them? Why not join the party?
What are the stakes?
Why would the son of the devil care? This sounds like chaos, a good time.
See lessHow do supernatural creatures attacking LA in any way affect the son of the Devil?
Why does he want to stop them? Why not join the party?