1. Posted: July 10, 2018In:

    A jailed former wrestler, gets another chance in the spotlight by putting on wrestling shows in prison, but after his early parole, he struggles to cope without it.

    Richiev Singularity

    I like the premise, I think it has promise, (hmm, premise promise, lol)However, it does not have a bad guy. Wrestlers (Babyfaces) always need a bad guy (Heel)Who is the antagonist?What are the stakes?What is the lead character's goal?

    I like the premise, I think it has promise, (hmm, premise promise, lol)

    However, it does not have a bad guy. Wrestlers (Babyfaces) always need a bad guy (Heel)

    Who is the antagonist?
    What are the stakes?
    What is the lead character’s goal?

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  2. Posted: July 10, 2018In:

    When a YouTube video ridiculing his attempt to feed off a millennial makes him a laughing stock, an ageing vampire rallies his fellow ageing monsters to remember their roots and terrify the community until mankind dare not venture out after dark.

    Richiev Singularity

    "When he becomes a laughing stock on youtube; after being pranked by the millennials he was trying to feed on, an aging vampire rallies his brethren,? inserts?his dentures and goes to war with his soy eating, beta harassers."

    “When he becomes a laughing stock on youtube; after being pranked by the millennials he was trying to feed on, an aging vampire rallies his brethren,? inserts?his dentures and goes to war with his soy eating, beta harassers.”

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  3. Posted: July 9, 2018In:

    After a chance meeting with his high school sweetheart reminds him he?s not who he aspired to be, a responsible 29-year-old risks his healthy relationship and stable career to live the life he dreamt of.

    Richiev Singularity

    This sounds like conflict, but isn't Unless you can give us a good reason why he should stay with his current 'steady girlfriend' you are not going to have dramatic tension.

    This sounds like conflict, but isn’t

    Unless you can give us a good reason why he should stay with his current ‘steady girlfriend’ you are not going to have dramatic tension.

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