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When a disillusioned married woman is absorbed by a surrealist painting, she struggles to develop the power to free herself from the painting before becoming part of it, while falling in love with a man of painting.
I think dpg is correct.In the Wizard of Oz, Dorothy is unhappy with her life and wishes she was somewhere?else.? However, through her adventures in the land of OZ, she realizes there is no place like home.I could picture something like that for your story. An unhappy mother and wife, disillusioned wRead more
I think dpg is correct.
In the Wizard of Oz, Dorothy is unhappy with her life and wishes she was somewhere?else.? However, through her adventures in the land of OZ, she realizes there is no place like home.
I could picture something like that for your story. An unhappy mother and wife, disillusioned with the day to day problems that go along with being a mom.
Then she sees the painting titled “A perfect day” and she wishes herself into the painting.
And everything inside the painting is perfect, perfect weather, perfect food, a perfect man…
Meanwhile, he husband and children are scrambling to find a way to get her back out of the painting. (This would be the ‘B’ storyline)
Soon it becomes apparent that perfect isn’t perfect, that those little problems and imperfections?in our lives are what give it meaning.
But try as she might she can’t find a way out of the painting.
Then she hears her daughter crying, “Mom, please come home”
And through the love of her daughter, she is able to escape?the painting.
She comes back to reality with the realization that she loves her life, warts and all
See lessAnd her family realize they have taken their mother for granted.
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Anyway, just some thoughts
After murdering an immigrant, he convinces his psychiatrist to declare him insane so as not to be put on trial, but a detective will follow his steps to lock him up.
Who is the lead character, the murderer or the detective? (I can't tell from reading your logline because it switches perspective?halfway through)
Who is the lead character, the murderer or the detective? (I can’t tell from reading your logline because it switches perspective?halfway through)
See lessWhen a disillusioned married woman is absorbed by a surrealist painting, she struggles to develop the power to free herself from the painting before becoming part of it, while falling in love with a man of painting.
Is there a bigger story than what you are presenting in your logline? Because as written, the inciting incident is way bigger than the goal. Inciting incident: The lead character's girlfriend?gets trapped in a painting Goal: lead must 'find a guy' How I picture the story going after reading the loglRead more
Is there a bigger story than what you are presenting in your logline?
Because as written, the inciting incident is way bigger than the goal.
Inciting incident: The lead character’s girlfriend?gets trapped in a painting
Goal: lead must ‘find a guy’
How I picture the story going after reading the logline:
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“Excuse me, are you the painter, no?”
“Excuse me, do you know where the painter is?”
“I think I saw him on the second floor”
“Cool, thanks”
“Excuse me are you the painter? You are! Great, could you help me?
“My girlfriend seems to have gotten trapped in one of your paintings, could you get her out for me before you leave the exhibit? You will? That would be great, thanks.”
Boyfriend patiently waits at the bar while the painter gets his girlfriend out of the painting.
The End
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I’m assuming there is more to the lead character’s goal than just finding a guy? If so, I would try adding what he must do to save his girlfriend, because it will greatly improve your logline.
Good luck, the set up sounds interesting.
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