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When a doting daughter discovers her father has committed suicide leaving his barbershop bankrupt, she must risk everything, including her sanity, to save the family business and discover the truth about her beloved father’s death.
You have given your lead characters two goals in the logline, You might try writing a logline where the lead character has just one goal (Although obviously?keep both goals in the actual story) Since saving the family barbershop seems to be the main storyline, I would concentrate on that for the logRead more
You have given your lead characters two goals in the logline, You might try writing a logline where the lead character has just one goal (Although obviously?keep both goals in the actual story)
See lessSince saving the family barbershop seems to be the main storyline, I would concentrate on that for the logline. Remember loglines are free. Write a few of them.
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“When she inherits her fathers failing barbershop after his apparent suicide, a devoted daughter leaves law school?to save the family business and the beloved workers she grew up with.”
An orphan developing strange powers is unaware that an alien force needs to destroy her if they are to succeed in invading Earth
While the concept sounds interesting... In the logline, you need to tell us what the lead character must do, because, in your logline, things happen to the lead character but the lead does not have a pro-active goal. So I would look at your story and figure out what the lead character's pro-active gRead more
While the concept sounds interesting…
In the logline, you need to tell us what the lead character must do, because, in your logline, things happen to the lead character but the lead does not have a pro-active goal.
See lessSo I would look at your story and figure out what the lead character’s pro-active goal is and add it to the logline.
When the daughter of a retired police officer is kidnapped by the son of an innocent man whom he sent to the death row, he must find the true culprit in order to obtain the release of her daughter before the day of the execution.
I think this is a very good concept, definitely a keeper."When his daughter is kidnapped by the son of a death row criminal who believes his father to be innocent, a retired police officer has 24 hours find the true culprit because if the kidnapper's father dies, so will his captured daughter."
I think this is a very good concept, definitely a keeper.
“When his daughter is kidnapped by the son of a death row criminal who believes his father to be innocent, a retired police officer has 24 hours find the true culprit because if the kidnapper’s father dies, so will his captured daughter.”
See less