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When two robbers conspire to rob from their rich friend’s arts gallery shop, stealing and selling an ancient sculpture to a ghost arts collector. Their success only attracts an endless torment that taunts them and their families until they retrieve and return their friend’s mysterious artifact.
The logline should start with the theft, then what they do about it."After robbing their rich friends art, two tormented robbers must steal back and return the art to their friends gallery if they are to clear their conscience."btw dpg is correct, you need to find a way to make the lead characters sRead more
The logline should start with the theft, then what they do about it.
“After robbing their rich friends art, two tormented robbers must steal back and return the art to their friends gallery if they are to clear their conscience.”
btw dpg is correct, you need to find a way to make the lead characters sympothetic.
See lesswhen a ghost appears to a lonely soldier suddenly just to advice him to leave his place in order to find love and suceed in it after having failed his first one.
One more thing, There doesn't seem to be any reason for the Ghost, the ghost is just doing something a best friend or a family member could do. You should not have have a ghost in your story if it's just going to do something pedestrian like give love advice.If you really want to hook the reader. IfRead more
One more thing, There doesn’t seem to be any reason for the Ghost, the ghost is just doing something a best friend or a family member could do. You should not have have a ghost in your story if it’s just going to do something pedestrian like give love advice.
If you really want to hook the reader. If you really want a good reason to have a ghost in the story. You should make the ghost the lead character dead wife. That would be a terrific hook.?
The Ghost of his dead wife sees how lonely he is, she comes to him and begins helping find a new wife. That would make an interesting story.
See lesswhen a ghost appears to a lonely soldier suddenly just to advice him to leave his place in order to find love and suceed in it after having failed his first one.
You are missing the action. You tell us a ghost appears to the soldier but don't tell us what the character does about it. You are missing the second half of a complete logline.
You are missing the action.
You tell us a ghost appears to the soldier but don’t tell us what the character does about it. You are missing the second half of a complete logline.
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