Odie/Richiev,

I like your construction Odie. problem with this construction is I can’t see that the detective is hunting the serial killer.

An other try:

“The schizophrenic lives of an LAPD detective, a serial killer posing as Hollywood’s Messiah, and a [third guy e.g., referee] intertwine in three tales of [word that links all three at their worst] and [word that links all three at their conclusion].

becomes

——
Fighting their demons, the tales of a SCHIZOPHRENIC LAPD DETECTIVE, a SERIAL KILLER, and a JUDGE, INTERTWINE as a REAL ESTATE BROKER convinces them to buy the same Hollywood mansion.
——

So in this logline I am only saying that the detective is Schizophrenic. And not saying the killer is SPLIT. Problem now is that the difference for me between SCHIZOPHRENIC and SPLIT is that with SCHIZOPHRENIC your SEE PEOPLE, with SPLIT you ARE PEOPLE.

But if it is ok to not say any of them is SPLIT, problem solved!!

I ONLY called the killer split so the audience at first does not know that the detective is SPLIT also, I made the detective Schizophrenic, so I can project the flashes he has (not seeing the face) of his alter ego’s, including the SERIAL KILLER, and the JUDGE, but not the BROKER — being the original WHOLE person; this because he has know memory of his life before the accident.

Twist their is a fourth alter ego, the one that was “whole” but had a trauma that got him split. Maybe lost his parents in a car exident of his doing, driving drunk. Somehow there must be a logical connection between all. An as Richiev says, the big reveal must be close to the end or at at the very END of the movie. Maybe the audience thinks they know all, but after a few small twist we get the big twist at the very end.

Also. The serial killer could be the only one who knows about the other alter ego’; knows he’s one part of a split person and his only option to avoid justice ‘FIGURATELY’ is KILL ALL THE OTHER EGOS. The bad guy as te ALLKNOWING EGO gives him the adventage — makes it more difficult for the detective to imprison him, after he finds out he is just one part of a split person. And that the missing peace he was looking for was the REALISATION BOTH OF THEM WERE ALTEREGOS OF THE SAME PERSON AND HE CAN ONLY IMPRISON THE KILLER IN A “WHOLE “MIND, .

The serail killer on the other hand, when he realises he can’t beat his by far most dangerous alter ego,in just a mind game, must now materialize the mind battle into the real world — also being the world where the audience can SEE the men confronting each other. He must try to kill them in the materialised state that audience has seem the aler egos all along.

Thats how far my brain fart goes right now…