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Oscar remembers his past and wonders why he is still a loser. That is until he meets the woman of his dreams.
This is more of a "tagline", which is an advertising tool. A "logline" sums up the concept in 30 words or less, and should contain a protagonist, a specific antagonist, the goals, the obstacles, the "hook", the stakes, some irony, and an idea of the genre. Geno Scala (sharkeatingman) judge...
This is more of a “tagline”, which is an advertising tool. A “logline” sums up the concept in 30 words or less, and should contain a protagonist, a specific antagonist, the goals, the obstacles, the “hook”, the stakes, some irony, and an idea of the genre.
Geno Scala (sharkeatingman) judge…
See lessWhen a brutal assasin wins custody of his two children after the biased outcome of a divorce proceedings, he intends to dominate their lives and discovered a great potential in one of them but then the table turned against him and his attrocities were exposed as the children struggled to be free from his cruel hands.
Btw, that was from Geno Scala (sharkeatingman), judge...
Btw, that was from Geno Scala (sharkeatingman), judge…
See lessWhen a brutal assasin wins custody of his two children after the biased outcome of a divorce proceedings, he intends to dominate their lives and discovered a great potential in one of them but then the table turned against him and his attrocities were exposed as the children struggled to be free from his cruel hands.
The obvious problem(s) are: no sign of a protagonist, spelling errors, and too wordy. If you switch POV to the protag, it might help in it's construction. The most intriguing part is "brutal assassin"; after that, he kind of goes downhill quickly. You're simply trying to throw in the kitchen sink- cRead more
The obvious problem(s) are: no sign of a protagonist, spelling errors, and too wordy. If you switch POV to the protag, it might help in it’s construction. The most intriguing part is “brutal assassin”; after that, he kind of goes downhill quickly. You’re simply trying to throw in the kitchen sink- common problem- when you should concentrate on the true “heart and soul” (seed, concept, premise, etc) of the story you want to tell.
Hope that helps…
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