1. Posted: February 23, 2013In:

    When team of zombie fighting monsters lose their commander an overzealous commando orders them to protect a solitary human that could save their food source from extinction.

    timmyelliot

    I like it. For me, at least, there are a few ambiguous references, the second "their" would almost apply to humans; the subject of "could save" (I figured it was humans, but I guess I'm so conditioned for the main characters to do the "saving," that I initial assumed it was the monsters) ... and, IRead more

    I like it. For me, at least, there are a few ambiguous references,
    the second “their” would almost apply to humans;
    the subject of “could save” (I figured it was humans, but I guess I’m so conditioned for the main
    characters to do the “saving,” that I initial assumed it was the monsters)

    … and, I guess my obvious question is, why a solitary human? shouldn’t it take at least two humans to repopulate? I’m sure you’d reveal the answer, but the question seems important enough to the story, it might need to be addressed in the logline?

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  2. Posted: February 23, 2013In:

    When team of zombie fighting monsters lose their commander an overzealous commando orders them to protect a solitary human that could save their food source from extinction.

    timmyelliot

    I'm a little confused about these words, "... a solitary human that could save their food source from extinction." I'm thinking this: the monsters eat humans, and are protecting them from the zombies who also eat humans. Right?

    I’m a little confused about these words, “… a solitary human that could save their food source from extinction.”

    I’m thinking this: the monsters eat humans, and are protecting them from the zombies who also eat humans. Right?

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  3. Posted: February 23, 2013In:

    A survivalist is forced to defend his post-apocalypse community from anti-technology fanatics and a traitor within the community's leadership.

    timmyelliot

    So far it feels like a situation. I'd like to also see a goal and the stakes. In other words-- a survivalist, forced to defend his community from ......, goes after some goal.

    So far it feels like a situation.

    I’d like to also see a goal and the stakes.

    In other words– a survivalist, forced to defend his community from ……, goes after some goal.

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