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In 1919 London, the heir to a shipping empire is so offended when a doctor tells him he’s not ill, just entitled, that he bets he can earn his living for one year without access to his father’s wealth or family name.
Has the potential to be an interesting story. But does it have to be a drama? Could it be a comedy/satire of human frailty and folly? And more importantly, does it have to be set in 1909? Could the protagonist…
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Louise, a 16-year-old serious girl who thinks she’s not able to love someone, and Elisa, a sensitive girl her age, becomes friends after starting high school. Elise starts her first romantic relationship with Lauren, a pesimistic girl who emotionally depends on her. Suddently, Louise falls in love with Elisa after seeing how she treats her girlfriend.
And then what? This sets up an interesting situation and an inciting incident for a possible plot--but what is the plot that follows? What dramatic question is raised that the rest of the plot will (eventually) answer? What becomes Louise's…
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In a Spanish village in 1954, Julia (the protagonist) is set to marry Miguel (the son of a sergeant). However, on their wedding night, Miguel discovers that his new wife is not a virgin; consequently, Julia’s father decides to kill Gabriel, Julia’s former partner and current lover. Gabriel’s murder sends shockwaves through the village, forcing Julia to leave in the company of her mother—whom she hates.
This could be read as a summation of the entire plot including the denouement; that is, she's forced into exile, doomed to live with a mother she hates. End of story, fade to black, roll the credits. But one of…
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A timid nature photographer goes out into a forest to try to take some photos but then stumbles upon a murder. They are shocked and froze in place, almost getting caught but then takes photos of the attacker and the victim to report it to the police. But later finds out that the murder was the person they are reporting it to and they must make a choice. Either put themselves as witnessing a murder and putting a target on their back or finding a different officer to report it to
The logline presents an interesting situation. And an interesting situation is a vital ingredient for a compelling logline, one that makes the logline reader want to read the script. Although it is a necessary ingredient in an effective logline--it is…
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Four scientists review the calculations for a devastating weapon, while the team leader, Pascual, begins to question even his own reality.
The logline lacks causality and coherence. What is the causal connection between the weapon and the main character's questioning of reality? Also, the main character has no objective goal; there is no indication of a plot.
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A mixed-race young girl (half spanish, half senegalaise) builds her own identity after being raised up by two parents with extremely different cultures.
I like the concept of a coming of age story involving a teenager struggling with identity, cultural and ethnic issues. Lots of potential for interesting and compelling dramatic conflict. However, what is she struggling toward? What is her objective goal?…
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When a curse puts all witches into an enchanted sleep, a young cursed witch receives a magical pendant that protects her, forming an alliance with a mysterious stranger. Together, they embark on a journey in search of the power of the stars, capable of breaking the spell.
★ Accepted
Let me try to unpack and sort out the logline elements: "...enchanted sleep". Enchanted connotes a capacity to charm, to allure, to attract, to captivate in terms of attention and desire. What is so charming, or alluring about being reduced…
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When a flight from NY to LA is high jacked, a new US Marshal must take down a terrorist before he crashes an airplane into a sports arena.
★ Accepted
Fairly straight forward. Might use the word "rookie" rather than "new" to describe the marshal. Might also add a ticking clock element to the logline to escalate the sense of urgency; that is, how many minutes he has to foil…
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Oh Goddess After his alpha friend turns alpha fiend and psycho-tortures him into the abyss, a wannabe hero’s new revelation and divine intervention rekindle his forgotten mission to replace religion.
>> alpha friend turns alpha fiend. I like that; I think it works. But... >>>the abyss Huh? Movies are a visual medium, so key elements in a logline must be concrete. That is, they must translate into visible objects and/or…
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I, Little Bunny Foo Foo, incorrectly branded a monster by folklore, beat the fucking shit out of the Easter Bunny, the true candy-coated dick who uses colorful plastic eggs to prey on unsuspecting children during the holiday.
An interesting character in search of a plot.
