To repay a debt, a gravedigger is forced to use his cemetery to cover up mob hits, but when the law leans on him, he must work both sides to avoid prison… Or worse.
Categories: Comedy
7 reviews
This one has a lot of potential. Maybe it could be turned around and played like a twisted version of "Risky Business".
The gravedigger is deep in debt and decides to starts this new business where hitmen and gangsters actually pay him to hide bodies in this fake cemetary. His business is successful, he gets rich and all. But problems arise when the police becomes suspicious and starts investigating his cemetaries.
Good work!
I like the premise, but suggest it needs a polish.
The character has a clear-cut objective goal, albeit initially a negative one imposed upon him by others, not one he would choose for himself if he wasn't forced to under pain of pain and death. ?The police meddling is a complication that increases the jeopardy and puts him in the horns of a dilemma.
Eventually he must "dig" himself out of the predicament, one that is of his own making. ?Which means he has to face up to the flaw that caused him to become indebted to the mob.. ?After all, the best comedy arises from situations created and exacerbated by character flaws, not merely bad fortune.
How did he become indebted to the mob, anyway? ?Why did he resort to a loan shark? ?What drove him to such a desperate and dangerous measure? ?Could the debt he owes the mob be a gambling debt? ?And if so, how did he incur the gambling debt? ?Because he's a chronic, compulsive gambler? ?Or because he was trying to earn some easy money to buy out or set up his own internment business?
Those are backstory questions, I know. ?But I suggest they may need further exploration and working out because, after all, the past (backstory) is prologue to the inciting incident and resulting dramatic problem and objective goal.
fwiw
I like the premise, but suggest it needs a polish.
The character has a clear-cut objective goal, albeit initially a negative one imposed upon him by others, not one he would choose for himself if he wasn't forced to under pain of pain and death. ?The police meddling is a complication that increases the jeopardy and puts him in the horns of a dilemma.
Eventually he must "dig" himself out of the predicament, one that is of his own making. ?Which means he has to face up to the flaw that caused him to become indebted to the mob.. ?After all, the best comedy arises from situations created and exacerbated by character flaws, not merely bad fortune.
How did he become indebted to the mob, anyway? ?Why did he resort to a loan shark? ?What drove him to such a desperate and dangerous measure? ?Could the debt he owes the mob be a gambling debt? ?And if so, how did he incur the gambling debt? ?Because he's a chronic, compulsive gambler? ?Or because he was trying to earn some easy money to buy out or set up his own internment business?
Those are backstory questions, I know. ?But I suggest they may need further exploration and working out because, after all, the past (backstory) is prologue to the inciting incident and resulting dramatic problem and objective goal.
fwiw