In tradition of the French new wave films of the 60s, a young tap-gamer struggles with success and relationship strain after a conglomerate buys his game, while the conglomerate chairman frames an African American trash-man for his recent statuiatory rape lawsuit.

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Shi-Bui

5 reviews

SSalvatore · Samurai · 655 pts

Tap-game = a smartphone game that you tap?

So is the main character a tap game developer and he made a lot of money selling his game to a big company?

If so I think "a young tap game developer" would better describe the MC.

Also a better adjective would help. "A brilliant tap game developer"?"A dyslexic tap game developer" etc. S

FFF · Mentor · 8,245 pts

I can't see how the differents parts create a whole... a game, a rape, an african american trash man, french new wave, conglomeration... this could be genius but as a logline I don't understand anything at all sorry.

Former member · Singularity · 114,965 pts

As Nir Shelter said.

Although a script may have more than one plot thread, a logline should only describe the main plot thread, the spine of the story on which everything else hangs.

And "struggles with success" is vague and a cliche. ?Exactly how does he struggle with success? ?Specifically, what? does the tap game developer do about the consequences of selling out to the conglomerate? ?What exactly becomes his objective goal?