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Comedic Drama Tv series: When a Nigerian foreign exchange student moves in with a white suburban, American family, cultural differences and close minded town ideals turns the once home, into a house of unrelated individuals
The Action is still vague. What's the source of comedy? ..cultural differences and close minded town ideals.. can be replaced with tangible conflict. Currently It reads as-After moving into white suburbs, a Nigerian exchange student [Conflict] must [Goal]
The Action is still vague. What’s the source of comedy? ..cultural differences and close minded town ideals.. can be replaced with tangible conflict. Currently It reads as-
See lessAfter moving into white suburbs, a Nigerian exchange student [Conflict] must [Goal]
I’m trying to write a script for a short film. Not a native speaker so I need help with writing my logline. Struggling with her economic situation, a lonely melancholic woman gets a one-day job to watch over a man with Alzheimer’s . Turns out that this man is her ex-husband who she got separated from 20 years ago, after their young child died.
>> Turns out that this man is her ex-husband..Interesting. After what duration of the film is this information revealed? Since it is a one day job, I'm guessing it is the Inciting event. If it isn't, that needs to be clear.Since we don't know what she must do after the discovery, It's hard toRead more
>> Turns out that this man is her ex-husband..
Interesting. After what duration of the film is this information revealed? Since it is a one day job, I’m guessing it is the Inciting event. If it isn’t, that needs to be clear.
Since we don’t know what she must do after the discovery, It’s hard to imagine what could be holding her back (the conflict). While the death of their child and separation is important for the narrative, it remains a passive information for the logline (unless it feeds into the conflict). Stories don’t exist without Conflict. Conflicts don’t exist without Goal. What becomes her goal after discovering his identity?
More importantly, how is your film being played out on screen when he would have trouble remembering her? It could be good conflict. If their relation is narrated through her memories, the form of the film changes, and so does your logline.
See lessIn a survivalist?s bomb shelter following the nuclear apocalypse, An adolescent mechanic is prematurely woken from cryogenic hibernation by a childhood friend out of desperation. Over last sixty years, he has been trying to fix the bunkers only reusable chamber in solitude due to limited rations. In order to save himself and the remaining sleeping colony, he must not only perform a seemingly impossible repair that has stumped more qualified individuals for multiple lifetimes, but cope with the inevitable isolation following his aged-friend’s death in the process.
How can a high schooler repair that which stumped qualified individuals for multiple lifetimes?? ? ||? It paints quite a premise, and their stakes as a team are very relatable. His goal needs to be made more visual. Even if he's a trained mechanic, what's stopping him from fixing the chamber? ConfliRead more
How can a high schooler repair that which stumped qualified individuals for multiple lifetimes?? ? ||? It paints quite a premise, and their stakes as a team are very relatable. His goal needs to be made more visual. Even if he’s a trained mechanic, what’s stopping him from fixing the chamber? Conflict equals drama. The obstacle between him and fixing that chamber is where you’ll find the story. Good luck with your writing.
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