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When terrorists cease control of the North Pole and take Santa hostage on Christmas Eve, the government sends in an elite task force to rescue him.
Hello, I don't understand "cease control"- the terrorist doesn't control the north pole anymore? I would say "When terrorists take Santa hostage on Christmas Eve, the government sends in an elite task force to rescue him". I don't have problems with 'the gouvernment': it will be the gouvernment of tRead more
Hello, I don’t understand “cease control”- the terrorist doesn’t control the north pole anymore?
I would say “When terrorists take Santa hostage on Christmas Eve, the government sends in an elite task force to rescue him”. I don’t have problems with ‘the gouvernment’: it will be the gouvernment of the production of the movie, or the US that is always there when the world need to be saved, or it can be a task force with people form many countries. Anyway it is not really important to mention the gouvernement, I think the elite task force is what matters.
“When terrorists take Santa hostage on Christmas Eve, an elite task force is sent to the north pole to rescue him”
See lessWhen the bodyless talking brains of the most brilliant scientists want to leave the country, their simple minded transporter must learn to use his head to pass the frontier before the government or the resistance get their hands on them.
I edited the logline, is it clear enough now? It's a sci-fiction/comedy where brains can live in tanks, outside the body.
I edited the logline, is it clear enough now? It’s a sci-fiction/comedy where brains can live in tanks, outside the body.
See lessAn amnesiac who wakes up chained to a table in a mysterious room must uncover why sinister doctors are performing grisly operations on him.
Hello, the amnesiac who wakes up and must understand what happened is a promising beginning (and maybe that's why I read it almost 3 times since I joined this site). What is the most important is to include in the logline a sketch of the plot, what we will SEE in the movie, or a very original elemenRead more
Hello, the amnesiac who wakes up and must understand what happened is a promising beginning (and maybe that’s why I read it almost 3 times since I joined this site). What is the most important is to include in the logline a sketch of the plot, what we will SEE in the movie, or a very original element that can really rise the curiosity of the reader. You have a good beginning but you need to be more specific about the rest of the movie.
See lessGood luck.