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When her favorite dream-streamer stops sharing his dreams, a rigid executive must help him dream again to win the contract of her life before her nightmares destroy her temper.
"the stated goal is framed in a negative mode". Sure, I tryed to correct this in a new redaction. And I change the adgective to avoid confusion about the mc (apparent) self-assurance. How is-it? (i think the structure is getting better but it sounds not really good)
“the stated goal is framed in a negative mode”. Sure, I tryed to correct this in a new redaction. And I change the adgective to avoid confusion about the mc (apparent) self-assurance.
How is-it?
(i think the structure is getting better but it sounds not really good)
See lessWhen her favorite dream-streamer stops sharing his dreams, a rigid executive must help him dream again to win the contract of her life before her nightmares destroy her temper.
Ok, I edited the logline, is-it better? Do I still need to precise the context? (a future where dreams can be shared and hired). I personally think the context is implicit. This could be a movie in the kind of "Her" or "eternal sunshine". I found interesting the questions about who is the MC (the prRead more
Ok, I edited the logline, is-it better? Do I still need to precise the context? (a future where dreams can be shared and hired). I personally think the context is implicit. This could be a movie in the kind of “Her” or “eternal sunshine”.
I found interesting the questions about who is the MC (the professional dreamer or the subscriber?). I think it’s better if the cold and self-assured executive try to motivate the dreamer: in doing this she motivate herself and the character can change. I can’t see the story form the point of view of the dreamer, who is certainly the second more important character – and there will be a love story at the end. At the end she won’t need a professional dreamer anymore because she has learned to dream for herself.
What do you think?
See lessWhen an institutionalized shopaholic finds out that the perverse clinical director use his patients as guinea pigs in a medical trial meant to increase consumerism habits, he must fight his addiction to sabotage the experiment and escape from the clinic.
what about: "When an institutionalized shopaholic finds out that the perverse clinical director use his patients as guinea pigs in a medical trial meant to increase consumerism habits, he must fight his addiction to sabotage the experiment and escape from the clinic."
what about:
“When an institutionalized shopaholic finds out that the perverse clinical director use his patients as guinea pigs in a medical trial meant to increase consumerism habits, he must fight his addiction to sabotage the experiment and escape from the clinic.”
See less