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A meek pharmacist falsely accused of an accidental death has to search for clues to the whereabouts of his kidnapped daughter in the tattoos of customers of a tattoo artist, who abducted her as revenge, before time runs out.
Hello, I think there s a story here! A good one! I ?understand dgp's point about the need of 1 goal, but in my opinion the problem is just in the writing form, not in the structure of the story. In other words, I don t think this logline is well written but you have all the elements so it s just a mRead more
Hello, I think there s a story here! A good one! I ?understand dgp’s point about the need of 1 goal, but in my opinion the problem is just in the writing form, not in the structure of the story. In other words, I don t think this logline is well written but you have all the elements so it s just a matter of working with the words to make clear that the main goal is to find the daughter using the tattoos and at the same time he needs to escape from the police. And i feel like in the end, he s really responsible for the death of his patient, maybe someone related with the tattooo artist? I would peek an anesthetic doctor rather than a pharmacist, with drug problems too. And he can use his drug skills to get informations for his quest. Anyway, i think you should polish your logline. I m positive about the fact that the kidnapping and the accidental dezth must be subtely linked to have a killer logline.
See lessOne ladt thing, you have no idea about how many daughters have been kidnapped on this website, and how many falsely accused men, so be sure to use this cliches in a clever way. I think that theese elements can work in yor story but be carefull.
In an alternate Arabian fantasy world, when an ex-patriot assassin is forced by a corrupt Sheikh to kill a rival, he must choose between losing his fiance’s life, or killing an innocent man.
Wow, i m listening to the radio and they are talking about a movie called the assassin by hu xiao xien, the story of a trained assassin who is sent to kill her lover in old china ?and must choose beetween love and her clan of assassin which is dangerous to quit! Try to study this movie, It seems toRead more
Wow, i m listening to the radio and they are talking about a movie called the assassin by hu xiao xien, the story of a trained assassin who is sent to kill her lover in old china ?and must choose beetween love and her clan of assassin which is dangerous to quit! Try to study this movie, It seems to me that it could help you. Here it s clear that quitting the clan of assassin is lifestaking and she must kill her lover, much more powerful than just ‘an innocent man’. And about the setting in the imperial china, it’s about the birth of martial arts. I’ll see this movie for sure.
See lessWhen a narcissistic property developer is convicted for murdering a government official, he must untangle the web of deceit, to prove his innocence
I don t like 'untangle the web of deceit' -too vague for me. What preciisely does the m c do? Looking for the real murderer like in the fugitive, and escape of course?
I don t like ‘untangle the web of deceit’ -too vague for me. What preciisely does the m c do? Looking for the real murderer like in the fugitive, and escape of course?
See less