Sign Up Sign Up

Captcha Click on image to update the captcha.

Have an account? Sign In Now

Sign In Sign In

Forgot Password?

If you'd like access, Sign Up Here

Forgot Password Forgot Password

Lost your password? Please enter your email address. You will receive a link and will create a new password via email.

Captcha Click on image to update the captcha.

Have an account? Sign In Now

Sorry, you do not have permission to ask a question, You must login to ask a question.

Forgot Password?

To see everything, Sign Up Here

Sorry, you do not have permission to ask a question, You must login to ask a question.

Forgot Password?

To see everything, Sign Up Here

Please briefly explain why you feel this question should be reported.

Please briefly explain why you feel this answer should be reported.

Please briefly explain why you feel this user should be reported.

Logline It! Logo Logline It! Logo
Sign InSign Up

Logline It!

Logline It! Navigation

  • Sign Up
  • Logline Generator
  • Learn our simple Logline Formula
  • Search Loglines
Search
Post Your Logline

Mobile menu

Close
Post Your Logline
  • Signup
  • Sign Up
  • Logline Generator
  • Learn our simple Logline Formula
  • Search Loglines
  • About
  • Questions
  • Answers
  • Best Answers
  1. Posted: September 2, 2015In: Public

    After the mysterious arrival of a stolen diamond and her missing brother's diary, an art forgery expert discovers that her long lost family was involved in an unsolved international crime, and is forced on a quest through the dark catacombs of Siberia to discover the truth

    FFF Mentor
    Added an answer on September 3, 2015 at 2:36 am

    Hello, I'm still persuaded that the word "mysterious" should be avoided in a logline. I don't understant what is a art forgery expert so you have to find a better expression. Then, "After the mysterious arrival of a stolen diamond and her missing brother's diary" This is not interesting. Sorry. WhatRead more

    Hello,
    I’m still persuaded that the word “mysterious” should be avoided in a logline.

    I don’t understant what is a art forgery expert so you have to find a better expression.

    Then,
    “After the mysterious arrival of a stolen diamond and her missing brother’s diary”
    This is not interesting. Sorry.
    What is interesting is what actually puts the story in motion and we must understand how and why.
    A serial killer kidnap my son. I care, this starts a story.
    I receive a diamond in my mailbox. Good for me. Then I go to Siberia looking for my missing family… Whaaaat!? Why!? This is not clear! Why? Logline Alert! You must come up with something that make sense, clearly, for everyone.
    If the book is a good book, you must find what is the very main element that put the story in motion: it’s not a diamond, it’s not a diary. And it’s not the world “mysterious”.
    Analyze the book. You must found something. A single thing, very very precise.

    Then,
    what is this thing about her family? Are they dead? Are they “missing people” (after a certain number of years this is legally equivalent to death)? Say things clearly. I don’t need to know if later in the movie we learn that they are not what we believed.

    I give it a try…

    When an anti-fraud art expert discovers that the disappearing of her family was linked to an art fraude, she ….. then what happens ?
    Many things happens in the novel but you have to find what is the VERY MAIN confrontation. Siberian criminals ? Read the novel again and find the MAIN thing. There must be something. One thing.

    And finally. Decide what precisely is her goal. Find her family? Solve as art forgery case?

    You must understand the difference betwen teasing and writing a logline. You tease too much. In a logline you must build a solid structure.

    Good luck.

    See less
    • 0
    • Share
      Share
      • Share on Facebook
      • Share on Twitter
      • Share on LinkedIn
      • Share on WhatsApp
  2. Posted: August 26, 2015In: Public

    When the most trusting man in America journeys to Nigeria to collect his expected inheritance promised to him in an e-mail by a prince, he must overcome bitter reality and find his prince in order to see the good in people once again.

    FFF Mentor
    Added an answer on August 28, 2015 at 9:59 pm

    "When a naive and stubborn middle school counselor fall in a "nigerian prince heritage" mail fraud, he travels to nigeria to claim his heritage no matter what". Have you seen "nebraska"? it's a good movie about an old man who believe a junk mail who says that he won a million dollar and he decide toRead more

    “When a naive and stubborn middle school counselor fall in a “nigerian prince heritage” mail fraud, he travels to nigeria to claim his heritage no matter what”.

    Have you seen “nebraska”? it’s a good movie about an old man who believe a junk mail who says that he won a million dollar and he decide to hit the road to collect his prize. It’s the story of his son who can’t persuade him of his error and finally decide to accompany him for his safety. I think you can build something with this kind of stubborn obstination. A man always positive, always smilin… I see a Jim Carey who goes to the bank to see why his heritage is not arrived. Again, and again, and he won’t believe anyone who tells him his prince doesn’t exist. He finally convince himself the prince must be in trouble so he travels to nigeria to find him. I’m honestly interested to see if he finally will find his prince despite all odds. Will the old man win a million? I’m almost crying if I thinks to the end of “nebraska”. Maybe the prince he will find is not what he expected but he will have a kind of “prize”, some kind of experience or maybe some amount of money, or love. Will he make money about a book with his experience?

    Well I definetely love this concept but it must be properly worked in a logline.

    See less
    • 0
    • Share
      Share
      • Share on Facebook
      • Share on Twitter
      • Share on LinkedIn
      • Share on WhatsApp
  3. Posted: August 28, 2015In: Public

    A down-to-earth teen couple must survive a nightmare abortion clinic to destroy the monster Chmanok.

    FFF Mentor
    Added an answer on August 28, 2015 at 9:20 pm

    Hello, I love the situation (teen couple in abortion clinic), but you must work a plot: what happens ? A monster (NEVER use names that means nothing in a logline) hunts them in the clinic ? What exacly is he inciting event ?

    Hello, I love the situation (teen couple in abortion clinic), but you must work a plot: what happens ? A monster (NEVER use names that means nothing in a logline) hunts them in the clinic ? What exacly is he inciting event ?

    See less
    • 0
    • Share
      Share
      • Share on Facebook
      • Share on Twitter
      • Share on LinkedIn
      • Share on WhatsApp
1 … 91 92 93 94 95 … 177

Sidebar

Stats

  • Loglines 8,002
  • Reviews 32,189
  • Best Reviews 629
  • Users 3,735

screenwriting courses

Adv 120x600

aalan

Explore

  • Signup

Footer

© 2022 Karel Segers. All Rights Reserved
With Love from Immersion Screenwriting.