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  1. Posted: September 28, 2013In: Public

    A laid-back man-child?s quest to get rich quick is disrupted when he becomes the legal guardian of a pugnacious twelve year old girl.

    LoglinesRUS
    Added an answer on October 2, 2013 at 6:38 am

    If he is laid-back, does he really "quest" to get rich? That seems somewhat contradictory. I like Richiev's title ideas. Very clever. But, when did the man-child become a con artist? I think, once you resolve who the man child is--his predominate character traits, then this might begin to gel a bitRead more

    If he is laid-back, does he really “quest” to get rich? That seems somewhat contradictory. I like Richiev’s title ideas. Very clever. But, when did the man-child become a con artist?

    I think, once you resolve who the man child is–his predominate character traits, then this might begin to gel a bit more.

    Finally, is the twelve year old girl the antagonist? Or could a court order child protective services agent be involved? What if having the twelve year old in his life, ultimately can fulfill his desire to get rich because she has a trust fund but he must first change his ways and learn a lesson–his arc.

    Lots of potential here.

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  2. Posted: September 29, 2013In: Public

    The reckless son of a marijuana grower falls in love with the naive daughter of the local sheriff who is determined to eradicate marijuana cultivation in this modern retelling of Romeo and Juliet.

    LoglinesRUS
    Added an answer on October 2, 2013 at 6:31 am

    I like this Logline. You have built in conflict and well defined protagonist and antagonist. I am assuming the two fathers are the antagonist. My only other comment would be to "show" how it is a modern retelling of Romeo and Juliet without saying directly so in the logline. For instance, "...the loRead more

    I like this Logline. You have built in conflict and well defined protagonist and antagonist. I am assuming the two fathers are the antagonist. My only other comment would be to “show” how it is a modern retelling of Romeo and Juliet without saying directly so in the logline. For instance, “…the local sheriff who is determined to eradicate marijuana in the county and protect his daughter from its influences and anyone involved with it.” Or something to that effect.

    Just a thought. Good job.

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  3. Posted: September 25, 2013In: Public

    When a hitman, who talks in his sleep, confesses to multiple murders to a hooker with a big mouth, the people who hired him and the police are out to catch him.

    LoglinesRUS
    Added an answer on September 25, 2013 at 4:04 am

    Good point Richiev. I appreciate the comment.

    Good point Richiev. I appreciate the comment.

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