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When a portal to hell mysteriously opens, an inexperienced mage born of the hellish dimension, is the only one who can close it and bring peace to the kingdom.
Why does the portal open up? Or rather, who opens it up? It feels like there is a big demonic bad guy you're hiding from the reader, and in super natural/fantasy, a story would benefit from having a clearly described antagonist.Also, is his birth place of any significance to the story? Sounds like tRead more
Why does the portal open up? Or rather, who opens it up? It feels like there is a big demonic bad guy you’re hiding from the reader, and in super natural/fantasy, a story would benefit from having a clearly described antagonist.
Also, is his birth place of any significance to the story? Sounds like this description can be cut (not sure what a hellish dimension is either).?
See lessTHOUGHT: What I like about my brief time on this site so far…
Yup, I've been a member longer than anyone active on this site (I think I was the fifth person to sign up) and have been benefiting from that this whole time. Thanks Karel. Also, I keep recommending this to other writers as a daily exercise to help train their critical thinking.
Yup, I’ve been a member longer than anyone active on this site (I think I was the fifth person to sign up) and have been benefiting from that this whole time.
Thanks Karel.
Also, I keep recommending this to other writers as a daily exercise to help train their critical thinking.
See lessAfter an elaborate conspiracy conducted to lure him in, a retrenched detective discovers a cult that promises him riches but the cult has more in store for him than what he bargained for. OR A desperate ex-cop joins a cult in order to save his family but the cult kidnaps his daughter for ‘slaughter’. He has to save her even if it means losing his own life.
What Richiev suggested. Your second logline option is better but lacks coherence - Richiev fixed it.
What Richiev suggested.
Your second logline option is better but lacks coherence – Richiev fixed it.
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