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In a future where criminals are punished with instant aging, when a young ex-convict -turned 70- learns about a place where his youth can be restored, he has a week to find it before the process becomes irreversible.
It wold play in your favor to introduce an element of innocence to the logline. What if the MC was wrongly accused of murder and sentenced anyway. The problem with capital punishment and pre aging, as you're suggesting, is that they are not reversible once executed. Where as a prison sentence will gRead more
It wold play in your favor to introduce an element of innocence to the logline. What if the MC was wrongly accused of murder and sentenced anyway.
The problem with capital punishment and pre aging, as you’re suggesting, is that they are not reversible once executed. Where as a prison sentence will go on for many years and if the accused is indeed innocent and can prove this after being sentenced then they would be let free. Where as this can’t happen with capital and pre aging punishments.
I agree with DPG an action film about a 60+ year old could be very interesting and hold potential for much comic relief. Look at Red and Red 2 for example, not sure the ages of the characters exactly but the point still stands.
Also the description at the start needs to be shorter and clearer i.e:
In a future where convicts are punished with accelerated aging…
Hope this helps.
See lessAn ordinary young man, is forced to become humankind?s sole savior when a diabolical alien race, wants to blow up the Earth.
Agreed with Craig and FFF. This logline still describes generic characters and actions such as: "?young man?", "...diabolical alien race?" and "?blowup the Earth?". Since this is a super hero scifi story the plot is mostly pre determined; the good guy wants to stop the big bad guys from doing a bigRead more
Agreed with Craig and FFF.
This logline still describes generic characters and actions such as: “?young man?”, “…diabolical alien race?” and “?blowup the Earth?”.
Since this is a super hero scifi story the plot is mostly pre determined; the good guy wants to stop the big bad guys from doing a big bad thing. In this case its the specifics of your story that will make it interesting.
Best to use more specific and unique descriptions these will also elude at genre for example:
If you were to say that the aliens want to terraform the Earth using human flesh (War of The Worlds) this would be scifi/horror .
However if you were to write that they want to suck out all of Earth’s atmosphere with a giant maid with a vacuum cleaner shaped space ship (Space Balls) its a comedy.
Hope this helps.
See less"An ordinary young man, is physiologically transmuted by an unimaginable energy that predates history and is irrevocably forced to become humankind?s sole savior when a diabolical alien race, seeking that power wants to blow up the Earth."
What Richieve said. Best to focus the logline on the plot and let the descriptions illustrate the flaws and obstacles in a concise manner.
What Richieve said.
Best to focus the logline on the plot and let the descriptions illustrate the flaws and obstacles in a concise manner.
See less