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When a happily married woman who hooks on the side sleeps with her husbands new boss, she must convince him to stay silent or her life will be ruined.
Thanks dpg for the advice, I think I will change it to "Bored" instead of "Happily Married"
Thanks dpg for the advice, I think I will change it to “Bored” instead of “Happily Married”
See lessWhen a young Vikings village is destroyed, he must get help from the mysterious warrior only known as 'The Dane Axe' in order to get revenge on those who killed his family.
This is an attempt to shorten your logline without taking anything away: "After a young viking's village is destroyed, He must enlist the mysterious warrior known as 'The Dane Axe' to avenge his family." However you also might want to tell us a little bit about who killed the family in the logline HRead more
This is an attempt to shorten your logline without taking anything away:
“After a young viking’s village is destroyed, He must enlist the mysterious warrior known as ‘The Dane Axe’ to avenge his family.”
However you also might want to tell us a little bit about who killed the family in the logline
Hope that helped. Good luck with this!
See lessA man who blacks out for seven hours each night has feared the day when his two lives collide, and when they do, the lives of millions hang in the balance.
Hello Jeremy, interesting idea but there is a little problem with the logline Your wrote the line: "has feared the day when his two lives collide" The problem with that line is you haven't told us what his two lives are. For instance if you said "A banker who's secretly a spy fears the day his two lRead more
Hello Jeremy, interesting idea but there is a little problem with the logline
Your wrote the line: “has feared the day when his two lives collide”
The problem with that line is you haven’t told us what his two lives are. For instance if you said “A banker who’s secretly a spy fears the day his two lives collide…” it would make sense because we would know what his two lives are.
Second, fear is not really an action. You want your hero to be proactive. For instance, using my example above the logline might say, “A banker who is secretly a spy “fights” to keep his two lives from colliding…”
As a result, I would change the word “Feared” in your logline to something more proactive. Give your protagonist something he must do.
Hope that helped, good luck with this!
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