1. Posted: February 24, 2019In:

    Amongst the Manchester riots of 1981, a union official?s young son watches as union corruption drives his father to a fatal heart attack. Years later and the son returns as a union official to fight redundancies for the same union men who killed his father.

    Richiev Singularity

    What is the lead character's?actual goal?

    What is the lead character’s?actual goal?

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  2. Posted: February 24, 2019In:

    Revised: A reformed crime lord is living a peaceful life until his wife is kidnapped by his former comrades, where, in order to keep her safe, he must do a list of dark deeds on numerous syndicates or watch his wife’s gruesome demise.

    Richiev Singularity

    I'm sorry, my logline attempt isn't very pro-active, however, I do believe it is a more streamlined version of what you wrote. ---------------------------------------- "When his wife is kidnapped, a reformed crimelord if forced complete 10 dark deeds for his former boss or his wife will be killed"?

    I’m sorry, my logline attempt isn’t very pro-active, however, I do believe it is a more streamlined version of what you wrote.
    —————————————-
    “When his wife is kidnapped, a reformed crimelord if forced complete 10 dark deeds for his former boss or his wife will be killed”?

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  3. Posted: February 24, 2019In:

    A disgraced sports pundit with gambling debts and having suffered memory loss, fights to stop a recurrent nightmare from becoming reality. He dreams of becoming a gambler and wasting his life.

    Richiev Singularity

    After I read this, I am wondering, What does the reader know? And when do they know it? How much of the 'memory loss' is known to the reader at the beginning of the story?

    After I read this, I am wondering, What does the reader know? And when do they know it?

    How much of the ‘memory loss’ is known to the reader at the beginning of the story?

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