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Wanting to be independent of her abusive alcoholic father a teen takes driving lessons with her pensioner neighbour discovery the father figure she needs and caring really means.
After reading this I realized you don't have an inciting incident. You have situation normal (The abusive father) You have an action (Taking driving lessons) But you don't have the incident which drives the teen to go from situation normal to the action.
After reading this I realized you don’t have an inciting incident. You have situation normal (The abusive father) You have an action (Taking driving lessons)
See lessBut you don’t have the incident which drives the teen to go from situation normal to the action.
“When her drink is spiked at a party a virgin finds herself pregnant and a seminary student is the father. Together they must go through hell to find a piece of heaven.”
The logline should be written from the perspective of the lead character: Example "When she becomes pregnant" Or "When her drink is spiked at a party" The goal of the character should be stated in the logline. It should be directly related to the inciting incident. Adding those two things to this loRead more
The logline should be written from the perspective of the lead character: Example “When she becomes pregnant” Or “When her drink is spiked at a party”
The goal of the character should be stated in the logline. It should be directly related to the inciting incident.
Adding those two things to this logline will improve it.
Hope that helped, good luck with this!
See lessTisi is a young girl from a religious family that spends her entire time taking care of her mother, in coma for 7 years. Things start to get creepy as Tisi learns that her mother is being harrassed by misterious opponents.
When she discovers her comatose mother is being harassed by mysterious beings, a devoted daughter must.... (Do this thing) in order to save her mother or else (This bad thing) will happen.
When she discovers her comatose mother is being harassed by mysterious beings, a devoted daughter must…. (Do this thing) in order to save her mother or else (This bad thing) will happen.
See less