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The Lord living under an alias tries to reconcile with his estranged daughter who is a member of SWAT, but kills to police officers in self defense and not only finds himself at war with a brutal police force, but his daughter and now the salvation of humanity hangs in the balance.
>>>if I fix the tech issues it will get made... But it isn't yet & while we are trying to point out the "tech issues" you really are posting the same version again. Do you think your film will solve itself? Currently it does not read as a film idea, however original your writing might bRead more
>>>if I fix the tech issues it will get made…
But it isn’t yet
& while we are trying to point out the “tech issues” you really are posting the same version again.
Do you think your film will solve itself?
Currently it does not read as a film idea, however original your writing might be. There’s got to be a reason why – despite of being inspiring – it isn’t sold yet. Try to wrap your head around that…
See lessJesus Christ living under an alias is brutalized by two police officers and decides to fight back bringing him face to face with his estranged daughter a sergeant in SWAT. Their confrontation will decide whether humanity lives or dies.
Hello LucienYork, welcome! I strongly recommend visiting this link below: https://loglines.org/?sort=vote Page after page It includes the top rated loglines posted here. It's really immersing and you'd get what is considered a "good logline" ...but maybe you've written your treatment or the first drRead more
Hello LucienYork, welcome!
I strongly recommend visiting this link below:
https://loglines.org/?sort=vote
Page after page It includes the top rated loglines posted here. It’s really immersing and you’d get what is considered a “good logline”
…but maybe you’ve written your treatment or the first draft well enough and only struggle to put it into a logline?? In that case, If you provide a link to your “work in progress”, we’d be willing to take a look and try our best to logline it,
because currently, there is no film here…
A logline must include a character-event-goal dynamic and must raise only this one question:
“will our hero achieve his goal?” Whereas yours leave us with many,
Why is Jesus Christ living under an alias?
Why was he brutalized by the two police officers?
(Is that you’re inciting event?)
How come he decides to fight back? How does his confrontation an estranged daughter decide whether humanity lives or dies? As a result, what becomes his objective goal?
Good luck!
See lessUpon successful human cloning, the mother and the Military of USA destroy the Earth, to redefine ?Mankind? and ?Humanity? on a recreated Earth.
After reading the plot, I'd say it has multiple unrelated elements which seem deliberately created rather than natural. The plot lacks a singular throughline. That's because her goal is vague. What must she do to ensure the safety of her kids? How does her being "biologically enhanced" works in theRead more
After reading the plot, I’d say it has multiple unrelated elements which seem deliberately created rather than natural. The plot lacks a singular throughline. That’s because her goal is vague. What must she do to ensure the safety of her kids?
How does her being “biologically enhanced” works in the scheme of your plot (so much that it needs mentioning in the logline)
See less“Social acceptance” of her cloned children needs to be more specific.
Why is her own brother gonna take them away?
.
.
A logline must raise this one question only:
“will the protagonist achieve his goal?”