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  1. Posted: June 6, 2015In: Public

    When a schizophrenic man is released from a futuristic mental institution, specializing in curing your inner ?demons?, learns that he is being hunted by an assassin, he must rely on his fragmented memories to survive.

    FFF Mentor
    Added an answer on June 6, 2015 at 8:36 am

    Hello, you need to characterize a little your main character (a "man" is too vague) and precise what is the inciting event (the event which put the story in motion). I assume the murder of the parents is backstory.

    Hello, you need to characterize a little your main character (a “man” is too vague) and precise what is the inciting event (the event which put the story in motion). I assume the murder of the parents is backstory.

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  2. Posted: June 6, 2015In: Public

    A troubled teen is mysteriously abducted and transported to a secluded training facility, where he and a band of juvenile misfits encounter an otherworldly enemy in a struggle for survival.

    FFF Mentor
    Added an answer on June 6, 2015 at 8:30 am

    Hello, in my opinion you have a kind of structure in the genre of "maze runner" but you should add some small precise details to make the logline more original and interesting.

    Hello, in my opinion you have a kind of structure in the genre of “maze runner” but you should add some small precise details to make the logline more original and interesting.

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  3. Posted: June 6, 2015In: Public

    A remedial math teacher is forced to wonder if he wasted his potential as a screenwriter when his ex-highschool sweetheart, now a hollywood actress visits their hometown.

    FFF Mentor
    Added an answer on June 6, 2015 at 8:25 am

    I agree with the previous comments. Wondering about a wasted potential can't give you a movie, not even one scene. What is the goal of the main character? What kind of opposition to this goal? "When a big movie star come back to his old town for a a shooting, her ex high-school sweetheart have one wRead more

    I agree with the previous comments. Wondering about a wasted potential can’t give you a movie, not even one scene. What is the goal of the main character? What kind of opposition to this goal?
    “When a big movie star come back to his old town for a a shooting, her ex high-school sweetheart have one week to prove her he can write the best role for her if he wants to win her love.”

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