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When humans cut down her park tree, a quirky, gray squirrel must join a tribe to make it through winter; but when she causes the death of her chipmunk sidekick and is compelled by her tribe to expel her love interest, she is forced to grow up in order to survive the winter.
The word 'When' usually describes an inciting incident. You have two 'when's' in your logline, indicating two inciting incidents... This is a logline issue. (Or perhaps a story issue)
The word ‘When’ usually describes an inciting incident.
See lessYou have two ‘when’s’ in your logline, indicating two inciting incidents…
This is a logline issue. (Or perhaps a story issue)
A well-known celebrity falls for a girl, unknowingly below his social status. He’s torn between honoring his familial traditions and societal expectations regarding relationships or following his heart and true desires regardless of the consequences.
Is social status still a thing?
Is social status still a thing?
See lessA police officer is forced into a deadly dilemma when an active shooter situation is revealed to be occurring at a nearby high school while a renegade trio of student activists respond by kidnapping and threatening to kill the parents of the shooter in a bid to make him stop his deadly rampage.
A one-location script would be better. As for your logline, it raises a question. If the police officer went to where the active shooter is and shoot them, aren't both scenarios solved? Besides if you have someone actively shooting kids that is where you go. You can send a negotiator to the kidnappiRead more
A one-location script would be better.
As for your logline, it raises a question. If the police officer went to where the active shooter is and shoot them, aren’t both scenarios solved?
Besides if you have someone actively shooting kids that is where you go. You can send a negotiator to the kidnapping but as an officer, you save the children. It doesn’t really seem like a dilemma as written in the logline.
However, that does not mean the story isn’t intriguing. It’s just I am not sure why one officer needs to be in two places at once.
So an interesting idea, but a logline that does raise some questions.
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