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On the run from a determined street enforcer, a young Londoner will do anything and everything to avoid capture but the enforcer has pledged to kill himself in the event of failure.
Kbf, I think at some point you just have to go with your gut. It's obvious that you believe in the idea that one character would rather die than be captured and one character has pledged to kill himself if he doesn't apprehend the first. That's your hook. Go with the logline attempt you are happiestRead more
Kbf, I think at some point you just have to go with your gut.
It’s obvious that you believe in the idea that one character would rather die than be captured and one character has pledged to kill himself if he doesn’t apprehend the first. That’s your hook.
Go with the logline attempt you are happiest with.
If I had any advice, (if this has not been written yet), set this in the eighteenth or nineteen century so it’s more believable that someone would throw themselves on their sword if they fail.
Because I believe that’s the sticking point, the idea that someone in this day and age would kill themselves over failure.
Hope that helped, good luck with this!
See lessWhen a reclusive writer tries to save her identical twin from spousal abuse, she sparks an entourage where all trails lead to a Scottish village and the dark secret of her suppressed memory is revealed in the climax of the church's fundraising bachelor auction.
I like the beginning 'When a reclusive writer tries to save her identical (sister) from spousal abuse After that it gets a little muddy... Mainly because i'm not sure how the second part of the logline relates to the first part. The leads goal is to save her sister, I'm not sure how coming up with aRead more
I like the beginning
‘When a reclusive writer tries to save her identical (sister) from spousal abuse
After that it gets a little muddy…
Mainly because i’m not sure how the second part of the logline relates to the first part. The leads goal is to save her sister, I’m not sure how coming up with a suppressed memory will stop her twins husband from beating her.
btw, Not sure what ‘…she sparks an entourage’ means you might want to say that a different way)
Hope that helped, good luck with this
See lessActing in concert, objects start to refuse to be a part of bad actions for no apparent reason
I'm curious, when you say 'things,' do you mean tables and chairs? Is this an Avent-garde movie? I agree with kuramo, as written it's hard to make out what's going on, you haven't presented a lead character or an antagonist which makes me wonder if this is sort of a surreal 'Eraserhead' type movie.Read more
I’m curious, when you say ‘things,’ do you mean tables and chairs? Is this an Avent-garde movie?
I agree with kuramo, as written it’s hard to make out what’s going on, you haven’t presented a lead character or an antagonist which makes me wonder if this is sort of a surreal ‘Eraserhead’ type movie.
just curious, hope that helped,
Good luck with this!
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